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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 12:20:33 GMT
Episode 4x22 "Learning To Fly"
so Eric has been accepted to Beach State University, and is taking Cory, Shawn, and Topanga with him to visit the campus because he doesn't have any friends.
Gee, it's almost as if his long-time father figure isn't knocking on death's door. You might almost think that everyone on the show has completely forgotten about it.
But yeah, clearly Beach State is no Harvard. And Feeny says as much to Eric in the backyard. As usual, Feeny thinks Eric is taking the easy way out with Beach State, and tells him to give serious consideration to Pennbrook, a fictional school that's actually worth a damn. The Feenster goes back inside, leaving Eric with "I know you'll do the right thing." That's sweet, but we already dealt with this "easy way out" stuff more than once. Oh well.
Topanga shows up and tells Cory she can't go, since her aunt allegedly doesn't want them together overnight without supervision. And thinking back, that does match what little we know about Topanga's aunt from Long Walk part 2. Cory's pretty upset, and goes so far as to mispronounce "kibosh". It's pretty clear that Cory wanted to have sex with his girlfriend on this trip, and it's not entirely clear how Topscotch feels about that, but she walks away without saying anything.
Apparently Eric has a female friend at Beach State and the three boys will be staying in her room at a sorority house. But the... I don't know... house mistress..? has very strict rules against boys being in the house, so it's time for stealth. She's even got a harsh German accent to drive the whole thing home.
This is a pretty fantastic running joke. Shawn does that a few more times, where he knows what someone else is gonna say, it's pretty funny. The girl is named Julie, played by Brigitta Dau, and she hasn't done anything else worth mentioning.
So Eric and Julie go to "windsurf around campus", leaving Shawn and Cory to fend for themselves. They're just sort of hanging out for like 10 seconds when Julie's roommate, Mary Beth, comes home. She was supposed to be at her boyfriend's this weekend, but apparently something's gone wrong. The introductions are a bit rocky.
Mary Beth is played by Lisa Dean Ryan, who was on 48 episodes of Doogie Howser, which I guess is significant. Shawn (because of his dream) explains that Mary Beth has just broken up with her boyfriend. Cory is kind and sympathetic toward her, which immediately sets off those Rebound Hormones in her brain. Meanwhile, Julie is showing Eric the "rec room", and Eric's starting to wonder if there's any actual learning going on at this school.
That couple are just sitting there sort of rocking back and forth on each other's necks for the entire scene, it's really awkward to look at, and must have been even more awkward to act out. I love this dude with the sunglasses though, and his bottle simply labeled "Beer". This is cool though, this is definitely not the same Eric that started out the season. He's realizing on his own that getting a degree here would be a waste of time. Good for him.
Back at the sorority, Cory and Shawn are still in the room for some reason, watching Mary Beth throw the mementos of her recently-broken relationship out the window toward a very very fake and not-moving sepia tone beach.
Also, it kinda looks like Shawn is wearing black nail polish in this episode, and I forget where I saw this, but Rider said he slammed his finger in a door the day they filmed this, and that's why it looks like this. Fun fact.
May Beth kicks Shawn out of the room so she can seduce underage Cory in private. She goes into the bathroom and shouts about how awful men are, and Cory vents his frustration about Topanga bailing on him, and then Mary Beth re emerges.
I don't think this would work on me. No woman has ever used an oversized football jersey in an attempt to seduce me, and I hope it never happens. Who the hell wrote that? "Dude bro what if a girl was like, into sports like us dude?" I don't know. Whatever.
She is goin HAM on this one, lighting candles and shit. Like, you can't mix sensual candles with a football jersey, those are two very different kinds of sex. Mary Beth puts on some porno music and Cory tries to bail, but the grungy German house mistress mother person is vacuuming right outside the door. MB's got her game face on now, but Cory insists that he has a girlfriend, and decides to prove it by calling her on the phone. Topanga's aunt picks up, and through some convenient dialogue, we learn that Topanga never even asked her aunt about going on the trip. So she's a big fat liar.
Noting Cory's new vulnerability, Mary Beth tries once again to take advantage of him, and then she goes to take a shower.
She is completely dry after her shower, as you can see, and also has some sort of something covering her cleavage. Overt sexual dialogue? Absolutely fine. Cleavage? THINK OF THE CHILDREN. And apparently she'll be going through her entire wardrobe this evening.
I don't know, there hasn't been much to review since that scene with Eric. It's mostly just Mary Beth trying to seduce Cory.
This episode wasn't written by the same guy who wrote the wrestling episode, 2x21, so I'm not sure if that's a throwback or just a coincidence. I hope it's a throwback.
Eric walks in on the proceedings and Cory asks MB for a minute alone with his brother. This is a real treat as Eric treats Cory like a mature adult, and doesn't try to scold him or talk down to him or anything. Basically like "Topanga is worth waiting for, but you can make your own decisions." Cory quickly turns that around on Eric, saying that Beach State is the easy way out, and that he'll quickly regret going to school here. It's a neat parallel, that they're both being faced with an easy "sure thing" that would ruin the work they've put into more valuable but less certain alternatives. We also learn that Eric never went to his interview for Pennbrook because he got scared.
That is a great question Eric. A wonderful question. Mary Beth walks back in the room just then and Cory officially, explicitly turns her down, setting an example for Eric to follow. He does indeed follow, saying "Let's go." You gotta love the sincere moments of brotherhood on this show. Or maybe it's just Eric in general. Either way, Eric has finally chosen to bypass the easy route without pressure from his parents or Mr. Feeny.
After some stock footage of a college campus, we're inside the Dean's office at Pennbrook. Eric wants another interview (since he missed the original one), but the Dean doesn't want to play ball. This is one of those scenes where you can see the microphone at the top of the shot for a split second.
Eric isn't taking no for answer, and it's honestly pretty amazing. It's a great scene, lots of emotion and "wow, Eric's really grown up". He talks about how Pennbrook will push him to reach his potential, and that if they don't accept him then the school "isn't living up to its potential." That really is a great line.
At the Matthews house, Cory and Topanga are discussing the fact that she blatantly lied to his face, but neither of them is really making a big deal out of it, which is weird. But Topanga explains that she didn't trust herself not to jump Cory's bones during the trip, which is a wonderfully refreshing take on teenage sexuality. The girl is having sexual urges?! THINK OF THE CHILDREN. So yeah, it's a cool scene. Except when you remember that she was ready to run away from home to spend the rest of her life with Cory, but is not ready for sex. Not being ready for sex is totally fine, I just think running away from your parents should come after being ready to take your clothes off.
During the credits, Eric is opening a letter from Pennbrook with friends and family eagerly looking on. You really have to watch the scene for the full effect, but he's finally done it. Eric got in to a good college. The (in my opinion) best character arc in the series has reached its glorious, teary eyed conclusion.
Plot: 0.75 - I really liked the foundation. Having Eric and Cory face similar trials of temptation and persevering. The problem is that it dragged on a lot during the middle. I mean how many times did Mary Beth change outfits? Good otherwise, though.
Character Development: 1.0 - Eric got into college! What an amazing ride it's been, from doing Feeny's gardening in 2x23 all the way up to now. I loved every minute of it.
Humor: 0.75 - Lots of seriousness in this episode, but the few jokes it did have were great. Shawn especially was very funny.
Life Lesson: 1.0 - Once again we've learned to try to avoid the easy way out. Cory and Eric both stood up to the temptation of a "sure thing" in favor of something worth working for.
3.5 out of 4.0. - The ending alone makes this episode a must-watch. But the whole ride is a lot of fun. The scene with the Dean of Admissions at Pennbrook is outstanding.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:09:39 GMT
Episode 5x01 "Brothers"
The new intro is... weird. It's really weird. It's a very significant departure from the first four seasons in that it actually has lyrics. I don't know who did the vocals, but they phoned that shit in, you can't understand a damn word. The characters are all "hanging out" in various locations, pulling pranks on each other, because look how real they are! They're so relatable! It's so in-your-face, I just don't like it. It's weird. And there really wasn't anything interesting for me to do with my logo.
How boring is that shit? If you've got a better idea, lay it on me.
Shawn and Cory are seniors now.
How exactly are they seniors, you ask? Well I have no idea. I had to give up on my timeline theory because the show contradicted itself so many times. Shawn even comments here that they've waited "three whole years" to go through that door behind them, the door to the "Senior Hall". And that just makes me weep for ever having TRIED to make a coherent timeline. THREE YEARS? YOU'RE TELLING ME THEY'VE BEEN AT JOHN ADAMS FOR THREE YEARS? BULL SHIT THEY HAVE.
I also doubt the existence of a Senior Hall, but I'm usually wrong about this stuff. And hey, Eric always walked around the same hall as Cory and Shawn when he was a senior. Ultimately, though, This introductory scene is really exciting to me, it just feels like Boy Meets World, you know? They both look and sound mature, and we're ready to go.
Inside the hall it looks like a Valentine's Day dance, with heart shaped balloons and silver streamers and shit, and the teachers are all swimsuit models. Topanga's being carried around by shirtless Roman gladiators, and Feeny is serving the boys milkshakes and prime rib. But then the fantasy breaks as the first bell rings.
So we're doing a front-to-back shot this season instead of the left-to-right hallway we've grown so fond of. Maybe "Senior Hall" was just an excuse to use a different set.
Surprisingly, that's all they wanted us to see at school. At home, Cory's telling Shawn how great it's going to be to finally have his own room.
So something's gone wrong at college. What a pity. All that work we did with Eric goes right down the drain, he's back to being an irresponsible goof. Apparently he didn't bother to fill out the paperwork for the school's dorms, so now he's here. And Alan doesn't seem to mind, while Amy's pretty pissed off about it. This is actually another character reversal. That speech from Security Guy that Alan made about taking off the kid-gloves in the delivery room when Eric was born? Well those gloves are back on and Alan's babying Eric again. Blargh.
Eric's being a general nuisance to everybody, so Cory decides to spend the next day looking for an apartment for Eric. This is Boy Meets World, so their problem is solved by a quick trip to Chubbie's. A charismatic young man enters the "restaurant" and announces that he is looking for roommates at Pennbrook, because that's what people do. Cory's like "hey, you should meet my brother." But ah hah! Cory's forgotten the first rule of Chubbie's! Everybody always shows up, and in this case it's Shawn.
Ladies and gentlemen, meet Jack Hunter, Shawn's half brother who apparently bailed on Shawn and Chet with his mother some number of years ago. I don't really understand how this works though. Chet had Jack with some other woman before Shawn was born, then married Virna and had Shawn. But Jack must have still been around at that point for Shawn to know who he is. But then how can Shawn claim that Jack and his mother bailed on them? How can Shawn even know who Jack's mother is? Unless Chet separated from Virna and lived with Jack, Jack's mother, and Shawn for some time, but that seems ridiculous. To paraphrase, Chet would have to go Jack's mother -> Virna -> Jack's mother -> Virna for Shawn to be saying the things he's saying.
Jack is played by Matthew Lawrence. Matt's career was basically done after Boy Meets World, but he was actually on a lot of shows before that, including 53 episodes as the lead role of "Superhuman Samurai Syber-Squad", which is obviously a masterpiece of our times. I'm probably going to go watch it after I finish writing this. Holy shit, Tim Curry was on that show too. What the fuck is this thing? Now I really do have to watch it.
And there's nothing wrong with Matt, he's a fine actor, he's easy to watch, but he's a lot like Eli in that the producers want us to care a lot about Jack's relationship with Shawn right away, but we just don't.
Back at home, Amy is looking to Mr. Feeny for advice about Eric, and she gets a little heated.
It's BS too, you're not allowed to yell at Mister Feeny, who does she think she is. She doesn't need his help anyway as she works out on her own that Alan and Eric are best buds so Alan can't bring himself to kick Eric out of the nest. Yeah, duh. But again, we solved that back in season 4. I like that they're trying to include Amy though.
Meanwhile, Jack shows up at Chet's trailer to try to reconcile. I don't know why Shawn is so upset, it's not like Jack chose to walk out on them. Either way, damn I love Chet. He's real excited to see his son again, and it's honestly ADORABLE.
As you can see, Shawn is not 100% in love with this idea. Jack hits the road cuz Shawn is being stubborn, and Chet hands him a jacket from the rack saying it's "going to be a cold one tonight", which is, again, ADORABLE. Chet loves his sons.
Shawn is still being stubborn though and refuses to leave.
Eric and Cory show up at Jack's place to check everything out and see if Eric would be a good fit as Jack's roomie. They're hitting it off pretty well, and they seem really comfortable with each other, even if Eric doesn't like the color of the refrigerator.
So everyone on this show is being stubborn today. Eric may not be the responsible adult we saw at the end of season 4, but he is definitely still hilarious.
At home, Amy reads her husband the Riot Act. He proceeds outside to tell Eric that he has to move out, because it's part of growing up, even though it's hard to let go of his son. Cory and Shawn are out there while it happens, and Shawn is now able to understand why his father was trying to "kick him out". So yeah, it's one of those neat little parallels where the two storylines intersect for a mutual life lesson.
So we can see how far Chet has come since he ditched Shawn back at the end of season 2. Great stuff. There' s a little scene where Eric and Shawn are moving into Jack's apartment, and Chet gives them the toaster he's been trying to fix this whole episode. It really is the sweetest thing.
Plot: 1.0 - There was a lot going on! We had the Amy -> Alan dynamic, the Alan -> Eric dynamic, and the Chet-Shawn-Jack triangle. Sometimes the events just flow so easily, and it's so easy to write the reviews for them. I don't know if my writing reflects that, but this is definitely one of those episodes.
Character Development: 1.0 - See that last gif above. Chet is a wonderful character. And we had some good stuff with Alan and Eric, even if we've mostly seen that development before.
Humor: 1.0 - Very funny from start to finish. The show is thoroughly in its "groove" at this point, the humor is so flawlessly intertwined in the plot. And that's how we like it.
Life Lesson: 0.5 - Ehhh, we sort of had the thing about fathers making the hard choice to let go of their sons.
3.5 out of 4.0. Great episode, great start to the season, except for the atrocious theme song. Seriously what the fuck is that theme song? Also, thanks to an anonymous comment for reminding me about Shawn's other half brother in The Pink Flamingo Kid. I think my deduction on that one was that he's Virna's son with some other dude, probably some other guy in the trailer park, so in fact that guy and Jack wouldn't be related, but that's total speculation. And Shawn also had a sister for one episode, back in the first season. It's crazy how this show can be so good while also being so inconsistent.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:10:19 GMT
Episode 5x02 "Boy Meets Real World"
Lots of opinions after 5x01. Seems that Jack is a polarizing character. Also I'm pretty sure this episode is terrible.
I'm sorry, whose what class? Is that before or after Mr. Turner's Particle Physics lecture?
Anyway we get a bunch of footage of these three colorful roommates being quirky or whatever, it's like MTV's The Real World. Cory even says those words explicitly, so either somebody got PAID or they're trying to appeal to a certain demographic. Shawn's bits are pretty funny, but all we see about Jack here is that he thinks very highly of himself. Someone mentioned in a comment on 5x01 that Jack has some seriously inconsistent character transformations, so let's keep an eye out.
In Feeny's film class the next day, Cory shows a preview of what he's put together so far, and everyone likes it, including Feeny.
Here's Mr. Feeny in The Graduate.
Feeny goes on to explain that if Cory keeps up the good work with this documentary, it could help him get into the film school at NYU. One of the extras is blatantly yawning in the background, maybe she didn't realize she was in the shot? It's kinda funny. The girl sitting next to Shawn, whose name is Angela, comments that Cory's documentary is a blatant ripoff of "that show on MTV, The Real World", and Cory's defensive response uses the phrase "real world" THREE times, so it sounds like they're trying to meet a quota for that sweet sweet payday.
Unsurprisingly, Cory's documentary is starting to get a little invasive.
A girl we've never seen before named Wendy is at the door, looking for Jack. Jack isn't home though, and this girl is apparently an acting major, so Cory tells her to kiss Shawn for the film. For whatever reason, she's down to clown, and of course Shawn is too. She enjoys this kiss with Shawn, and let's be honest, who wouldn't, so she gives him her number. Cory comments that a girl who came looking for Jack ended up with Shawn. God that was so weird to write, it's like, I'm relaying the nonsense content of a sitcom doing the nonsense content of a reality show.
And then more nonsense. Cory, Topanga, and Shawn are eating at Chubbie's when Jack and Wendy show up on a date. Shawn pulls Jack into the back room to be like "what the fuck bro" even though it's totally not Jack's fault. Shawn is being completely ridiculous here. He shouldn't care at all about Wendy, and he shouldn't be mad at Jack when Jack couldn't have possibly known that Shawn was interested. But then Shawn's like "yeah you win" and storms off because this is season 2.
Jack is very sensible about the whole thing and even offers to end the date, but Shawn is still 13 so that doesn't work. Cory just stands by filming the ordeal.
At home, Morgan has hired her friend's older brother to be the new Eric, which is pretty funny. The real Eric shows up too and doesn't mind the fake Eric, and also informs Cory that Shawn and Jack are "about to kill each other". I am really bored with this.
Corpanga arrive at the apartment, where Shack are arguing about some shit. We learn that Jack is paying for college with student loans and works for his spending money (his step dad is super rich) but Shawn still won't cut him a break. The scene ends with Shawn declaring that he's moving out because, again, he's 13. Eric has experience as a weather man, maybe he can tell us what to do about all this storming out. ...That's not clever, I'm sorry.
That's Topanga's angry-face, directed into Cory's camera. She's pointed out a few times that Cory is forsaking his best friend to make this documentary. And what the hell are Shawn and Topanga doing for their film projects? They were both in Feeny's film class with Cory. I want to know what they're making.
Outside the apartment, Cory defends his lassez-faire style of film making, but Topanga insists that he's being a terrible best friend, and then makes the worst dramatic exit I have ever seen.
Honestly, this is dumb. Earlier at Chubbie's and just now at the apartment, Topanga has been equally silent in these matters. She can just as easily try to help defuse the tension as Cory. Yeah Cory's the best friend, but she's still Shawn's friend, so I don't know why she's just watching it all happen.
At home, Morgan is trying to convince Mister Feeny to give life advice to the fake Eric. I never thought I'd say this but Morgan is probably the most interesting part of this episode. She misses her big brother and the replacement-Eric running joke is consistently funny. Cory arrives on the scene and decides it's his turn for advice. Feeny basically just tells him to stop being such an asshole. But in his sagely, inspiring way.
Now we're dacing. At the apartment. Jack is dancing with Wendy, and Eric with some unnamed girl. It goes on wayyy too long and Eric+his girl just keep doing the same four steps over and over, it's really strange. Jack isn't into it though, he's real upset about Shawn moving out, so the girls end up leaving. Eric tells a weird story about a brotherly experience he had with Cory, and even though he admits that it's a dumb story, he also points out that Jack doesn't have any stories like that with Shawn. It sounds like it's supposed to be profound, but it doesn't make any sense in the situation. The only thing it accomplishes is making Jack feel bad about not being close to Shawn, but he's been actively trying to get close to Shawn, so I don't understand this scene.
Meanwhile, Shawn is busy doing this:
Yeah that's believable. This is "south Philly" outside the building where Shawn and Jack used to live with Chet, some time before season 1. Cory shows up saying "I had a feeling you'd be here." No you fucking didn't, Cory. I would've expected him to be at Chubbie's. Or at the trailer. Whatever.
Cory films Shawn (at his request) as he tells the story of writing fifteen letters to Jack when he was about 10 years old. Naturally, Jack walks up behind him at that exact moment saying "I never got any letters."
WHAT IS ANYBODY DOING HERE
Apparently Jack's mom threw the letters away before he could ever read them, and Shawn's response is "I don't believe that!" and he tries to storm off again. But Cory stops him this time and directly says "You're not listening to him," which is pretty much spot on. Except the fact that they're all adults and this shouldn't be happening.
So I guess this is the part where Cory chooses his friendship over his documentary. And that's enough to make Shawn realize he's being a dumbass.
During the credits, we get a bunch of Real World style interviews with all the characters, and they're all pretty funny. Even Morgan's. Is this the season? The season where Morgan is funny? Is that possible? That remains to be seen. Either way, I still don't mind Jack after this episode. Shawn is pissing me off more than anybody else right now. This whole thing would have been resolved if he had just listened to Jack in the very beginning. It's like Turner all over again, except he's not a kid anymore.
Plot: 0.25 - The conflict was so forced. Shawn was being absolutely ridiculous, even for Shawn. I'm honestly amazed how patient Jack was with Shawn's bull shit.
Character Development: 1.0 - Shawn wants to get close to Jack now, so that's important.
Humor: 1.0 - Yeah it was actually pretty funny. Eric popped up every once in a while, Morgan and fake Eric were good, Feeny was funny... So that was fine.
Life Lesson: 0 - Don't be like Shawn in this episode. And don't... value a documentary over your friends... I guess...
2.25 out of 4.0 - The problem is sort of similar to the previous episode. They're frontloading this Shack conflict wayyyyy too much. We're not ready for this, it's coming on way too strong. We just met Jack, this is all happening way too soon for us to be invested in it. And Jack's biggest selling point, the fact that he's a buddy for Eric, didn't even come into play in this episode. And for the record, no, this episode does not make me want to watch The Real World.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:11:45 GMT
Episode 5x03 "It's Not You, It's Me..."
Mister Feeny's class is coming to a close as he's just finished explaining to Shawn how babies are made. He also offers a quick reminder that next Friday is "college recruitment day", and that Cory's meeting with the Standford folks has been rescheduled. I'm not really sure when Cory stopped being a terrible student, but he's clearly left Shawn in the dust. And Shawn's not happy about it. Cory's looking at a lot of colleges that Shawn can't get in to, but Cory insists that he doesn't know what his plans are yet.
I talked a lot in the previous two episodes about Shawn's annoying whining, but his whining today is actually in good humor. We're bringing back the bromance today.
They both decide that they should make new friends because they'll eventually end up at different colleges, but I mean there's no reason to think that these new friends will be at college, so this doesn't make a ton of sense. But that's love, I suppose.
In class later, Shawn has found a new friend, whose name is Andy, to sit in Cory's desk.
Cory proceeds to make friends with a guy named Lionel at the front of the room. Lionel offers Cory some grapes to celebrate their new friendship. It's pretty funny. Not much else to say.
At the apartment, Eric is apparently post-haircut. It is a drastic change from the previous episode, and nobody even mentions it.
They make a big deal about his haircut at the beginning of season 7, but this one passed without any notice. In episode 3. It's strange timing. Had to check and make sure I was watching the right one.
Eric and Jack have 10,000 word papers to write. Eric can't think of anything and Jack's is mostly lies, so Eric comes up with the plan of making friends with "the dean" to make their college lives easier. Which dean exactly? There are a lot of deans. I don't think this is a very good plan, you guys.
At home, Morgan makes fun of Cory for being dumped by his boyfriend. Alan comes home and wonders why he didn't see Cory at "Pink's" around lunchtime, since Shawn was there (with some other people). What the fuck is Pink's? It doesn't even matter, I'm just amazed that they mentioned a restaurant in this show that isn't Chubbie's. Anyway this information just makes Cory feel worse.
So this next scene is exactly what the comments have been talking about so far. Eric's trying to get Jack in on his crazy scheme, and Jack is just like "come on man", "this is a bad idea man", "I don't wanna do this man". And eventually Jack caves in. The dean's office door just says "Office of The Dean", so we're just gonna have to roll with that. The Dean is a real jerk to Eric, essentially the Anti-Feeny.
Now we're at Chubbie's with Corpanda and the guy who gave Cory grapes earlier. Topanga pulls her boyfriend aside and Shawn is just afraid of losing his best friend. But then Shawn shows up with three new friends, and Cory can't help lashing out.
It's all pretty silly, but there's nothing new for me to talk about. Next, Cory and Mr. Grapes go to Shawn's apartment to collect the stuff Shawn's borrowed over the years, and it's already waiting for him in a cardboard box outside the door. Inside, Shawn's throwing a party, and we get the same conversation that's been in every scene so far.
It's still funny, but I mean, of course it is, because it was funny the first two times.
I mean, this episode a direct line from point A to point B. They're obviously going to make up, it's just a question of how many jokes we make in the meantime.
It's night time now as Eric and Jack arrive at The Dean's home. I don't know how they got his address. They do the exact same shtick as before, where Jack doesn't wanna be here but Eric says enough nonsense that Jack sticks around.
Everything else aside, Jack is actually really funny here. Due partly to the fact that babka is just a silly word.
Next, these two hooligans are at the Matthews-Feeny backyard, where Eric Feeny-Calls his mentor out to them. Eric introduces Jack and COMPLETELY FORGETS TO ADD THAT HE'S SHAWN'S LONG LOST BROTHER, something Feeny would proooooobably want to know. Mister Feeny assuages their fears, and suggest they use their fear and anxiety as a topic for their paper, which Eric says is an "open assignment", so the topic can be anything.
The next day at school, Shawn and Cory show up at Feeny's office under false pretenses. Turns out, Topanga set this up to deal with their silly fight.
The first time they did the "gasp Topanga" was at the end of 4x11, and it might be even funnier this time, if you can believe it. That was actually the other bromance episode too. Interesting.
Shawn and Cory are both reluctant to try to reconcile, but Topanga insists that Mr. Feeny make an effort to fix this. He responds with one of my favorite Feeny lines ever.
Hilarious.
Now for something I didn't expect. Shawn claims (yells, really) that Cory decided he was too good for Shawn the day they met. Honestly Shawn has yelled almost every line in this episode, it's really annoying. The flashback zooms out on some sort of zoo, accompanied by that one stock sound of children laughing, you know the one. It's the cringiest goddamn thing, these children are so terrible, and child Cory has glasses for some reason. But anyway, Shawn saves Cory after he falls into the llama pen.
The only remotely acceptable thing about this scene is that Topanga is here. They ACTUALLY decided to include a minor detail for the sake of consistency, albeit the consistency of a retcon. I've complained about the lack of those details so many times, so this instance is much more refreshing than it ought to be. You can tell they were fuckin DYING for content in this episode.
Woah okay, gotta draw the line there. I'll hug my best friend all god damn day, ain't no Topanga gonna tell me I can't. The audience thinks it's fuckin hilarious, but I'm not crazy about it. If we compare this episode to 4x11, which was the first time we did the "haha they're boyfriends" thing, this episode has been a lot less cool about it. Like, this episode wants us to think that there's something wrong with Cory and Shawn to be like this. I didn't mention that until now because I was trying to ignore it, but this "stop it, you're boys" really rubs me the wrong way.
And now the conflict is over.
How bout you chill the fuck out Topanga? Jesus Christ.
During the credits, Jack and Eric have broken into The Dean's office. Jack's ability to speak Chinese buys them an extension on their papers. Yeah I can't explain it better than that.
Plot: 0.25 - It sucked. It could have been good, but it sucked. There was a beginning, and an end, but nothing in between.
Character Development: 0.25 - I guess we saw how Shawn and Cory met, which was new information, and Jack settles into his position as Eric's lackey.
Humor: 1.0 - Yeah it was pretty funny until Topanga's little outbursts.
Life Lesson: 0 - You can fuckin hug your friends if you want to.
1.5 out of 4.0. This episode sucks.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:12:30 GMT
Episode 5x04 "Fraternity Row"
ack's out in the hallway of his apartment building in a beach chair "studying", but really just trying to talk to girls who walk by, and it's actually working. Eric comes up the elevator and is looking absolutely darling today.
Ahyuk-hyuk-hyuk. Eric's going about his crazy antics while Jack throws us a quip to point out just how crazy those antics are. Four episodes and I'm already bored with this dynamic. They tried, and I give them credit for trying, but it's just not interesting. We know Eric's antics are crazy. We've been watching them for four seasons already, and we love them. I don't need some kinda Jack Hunter to tell me what's goin on. But I have a feeling that's what I'll be getting for a long time.
So yeah Eric decided to pledge to some stupid fraternity and they made him wear that dress. Cory and Shawn show up in the elevator just as Eric and Jack go inside. Shawn meets a pretty blonde girl named Jennifer, so that's two pretty girls in like 30 seconds coming down this hallway. It's the place to be, man. Move over, Chubbie's.
Shawn is holding the textbook Jack left in the hallway, Introduction to Western Philosophy, so Jennifer sees it and flirtatiously promises to save Shawn a seat in class tomorrow.
In Feeny's class... the same day...? Was it morning just now? It would have to be, but then why was everybody coming home? I don't know. Anyway Feeny tells the class that they've forgotten the basics about writing papers, grammar-wise and such, and tells Shawn to start applying himself, but Shawn maintains his self destructive attitude.
Shawn's sort of jumped into the IS HE GONNA GO TO COLLEGE? void that Eric left behind at the end of season 4, and I'm okay with it. You know why? Because they built up to it. I slam a lot of stuff on this show for coming out of nowhere, but look, when they actually build up to these things it's perfectly fine, even if it's the same sort of arc as last time. An interesting difference though is that Eric was more about overcoming his present self, while Shawn is going to be about getting over his past.
Back at Pennbrook, Eric's handing out fliers for a fraternity party at his apartment, and Jack shows up and explains why THIS IS SUCH A BAD IDEA. "The Dean" comes out of his office like "why the fuck is everybody on campus handing out fliers", and I really wish I knew the answer to that question. I would always put my earbuds in and stare at the ground while I walked past those people, "don't look don't look don't look don't look". I hate fliers. Anyway Eric claims that his fraternity is Magnum Pi, since some kid walks past in a Magnum P.I. shirt. The Dean doesn't question further and Jack points out to Eric how bizarre The Dean is. So it's not just Eric, every character in this show now exists as fodder for Jack's one-liners.
At John Adams, Cory's trying to write an excuse "from Shawn's parents" since Shawn is cutting class, but he can't remember how to spell his name.
So that's pretty funny. Feeny comes in asking Cory where Shawn is, and it fades over to a college classroom that actually looks like a brand new set. It's certainly not a $5 makeover of Chubbie's like we're used to. Shawn walks in and joins Jennifer in the front row of desks, and the professor begins discussing "Buridan's paradox", a thought experiment that's actually called "Buridan's ass", but they've replaced the donkey with a dog. Anyway Shawn makes some interesting points about the paradox and sort of lucks his way into an impressive answer, and the professor wants to probe further.
That always gives me a good chuckle.
When I was younger I thought this was nonsense, but in college it's hilarious how often people walk into class that you've never seen before. Anyway Shawn's working on a philosophy paper (a biography of Schopenhauer) at John Adams the next day or later the same day, whatever, instead of working on Feeny's assignment. Cory comments that Shawn is making a huge effort to impress Jennifer, but Shawn explains that he is actually really enjoying this philosophy stuff and that he's good at it. We can look back to B&B's B 'n B in season 4 for another example of Shawn's passion and excitement when he finds something he's good at and enjoys. And it makes me excited to see it. This also raises a bigger point about students whose skills lie outside the high school curriculum. They're just sort of doomed to mediocrity and being labeled a failure because they aren't interested in the "core" subjects at school.
Topanga and Minkus are monkeys, while Shawn is more like the fish. Actually, Minkus might be the bird. Cory is probably the dog.
Feeny's class begins, but Shawn remains in the hallway to work on his paper. Feeny starts punishing Cory for covering for Shawn, and eventually the whole class (which is insane) until they all point to where Shawn is out in the hall. Shawn claims to be exercising his "free will", and so Feeny suspends him on the spot.
At the apartment, The Dean shows up (every scene with The Dean is absurd) and threatens to expel Jack and Eric if their fraternity turns out to be fake. That's pretty extreme, but The Dean is clearly out of his mind. In the heat of the moment, Eric claims that the frat is funded by celebrity alumni, and Jack fumbles out that the alumni are Ted Lange and Bernie Kopell from the show The Love Boat, which ran for 10 seasons from 1977 to 1987. I have never seen it. The Dean says he looks forward to meeting them at the fraternity party. At this point I have absolutely no investment in this sidestory. It's dumb. And it's stupid. And it's dumb. Eric's not really even funny.
Now we're back in college.
That sounds like something modern day Rider Strong would say in real life. This might actually be the reason I looked up Nietzsche for the first time, and his work has had a considerable effect on me. Thanks Boy Meets World.
Yes please.
Cory quickly sneaks into this class too now to convince Shawn to go talk to Feeny. It's not really working, and then the professor calls on Cory to discuss life and existence. Cory's response to being called on is "oh my god I've been hit", which is hilariously realistic. It looks like Cory's going to luck into an answer the same way Shawn did, but the professor throws it back in his face, which is pretty funny. Teach hands back the papers the students wrote, and at this point the charade would surely fall apart as Shawn is not in the system to receive his grade, but it's fine. Shawn got an F on his paper because it was written so poorly, a callback to "learning the basics" that Feeny was talking about in his class earlier. Shawn storms out of class because that's what he does, and Cory follows soon after because that's what he does. The whole scene is funny and well written, the professor especially. He's played by the late Julius Carry, who hasn't done anything else I recognize, but he does come back to Boy Meets World in season 7.
Now it's time for Eric's frat party, which is literally just 20 girls and Eric and Jack drinking SODAS in their apartment. This might be the single worst offender of breaking reality in the series. Worse than the time travel episodes. Welcome to ABC. And then The Dean just walks into the apartment and starts yelling at Eric and Jack, because it's a sitcom and the law doesn't matter. Eric is scared and redeems himself in the humor category.
Matthew Lawrence is trying desperately not to laugh there, and I don't blame him.
Jack's not worried though because he's rich. He calls in the guys from The Love Boat and everybody stands around looking at them while the audience cheers for like ten seconds. Ugh. This scene is probably a lot funnier if you watched Love Boat or anything else with these guys. Apparently Ted Lange played the bartender on the Love Boat, and keeps asking if he can make anyone a drink. It's tongue in cheek but still not funny, and it doesn't matter anyway because this party only has Cola brand Cola. The Dean isn't even impressed and still demands that Magnum Pi be closed down by the next morning, and then takes the Love Boat guys home to meet his mom. It's weird. The whole thing is weird.
When The Dean and the celebs leave, Eric and Jack have an orgy with all of the girls. That's the implication anyway.
In The Backyard, Shawn tries to reconcile with Mr. Feeny. He apologizes for being an assclown, and Feeny asks to see the paper he wrote about Schopenhauer.
And then they all hug it out over the prospect of Shawn going to college. Feeny promises to continue teaching "the basics" of writing, even though Mister Feeny is their history teacher.
Why do philosophers always have such complicated names? Where's the great Smith, founder of Smithology? I already know I'll never be a famous philosopher because my last name isn't very hard to spell.
But yeah, this is one of those scenes where we remember what an amazing teacher Feeny is. That's really what it's all about right there, engaging the students, using something they like to bring them into the lessons- adding a little water slide so the fish can climb the tree. It's beautiful.
During the credits, the Matthews family does some cringey shit with the Love Boat guys, I don't wanna talk about it.
Why the hell was this called Fraternity Row? That story was almost negligible. If they played up the "brotherhood" between Cory and Shawn I could understand, but... they didn't.
Plot: 1.0 - It's a great story, and easily relatable. What do we do when a student is fascinated by something outside the curriculum? How do we keep the attention of the students whose skills lie elsewhere? It's still a very important question today. That little cartoon I posted really sticks in my mind. The whole fraternity thing was stupid, but it only had like two total minutes of screen time, so I don't really even think about it.
Character Development: 1.0 - Shawn has a new passion that we'll probably never hear about again, but he also has a renewed drive to get into college. That's pretty significant for this season.
Humor: 0.75 - Eric really dropped the ball, except for "take my hand and pray". Cory did most of the heavy lifting for humor in this episode, which is still nice.
Life Lesson: 1.0 - Give the fish a water slide.
3.75 out of 4.0. Let's look at everything Shawn can do over the series so far: he made 1st string in basketball, he's good at theatre, he has exceptional social skills, he can speak French, he ran a popular radio show, extensive knowledge of pop culture, worked at his uncle's garage, he worked for the mob, has an aptitude for running a business, joined a cult, and now he has a passion for philosophy. What the hell has Cory done?
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:13:11 GMT
Episode 5x05 "The Witches of Pennbrook"
This aired on October 31st, it's a Halloween episode. I don't have great memories of this one, but it can't be worse than Who's Afraid of Cory Wolf.
So Eric is trying to drag Jack out to a club to meet women, and Eric's got his "I'm a real wacky guy" face on, so it's business as usual. Except when Jack claims that he's "uncomfortable picking up girls". Is that so, Jacky boy? Your beach-chair-in-the-hallway from last episode with the sole purpose of picking up girls says otherwise. At the 1:20 mark, we're presented with Candace Cameron, who we all know as DJ Tanner from Full House. What the fuck is she doing on my show. Eric tries to hit on her, but she's much more interested in Jack and introduces herself as "Millie from 3b".
THAT AIN'T FULL HOUSE.
It cuts to Eric returning from the club later (alone, of course) and he immediately takes off his pants and heads over to his computer. ...Yeah, that sounds about right. But when he pulls up the blinds on the window (for whatever reason), he spies Jack and Millie comin around first base on the balcony. DEFINITELY NOT FULL HOUSE.
I think they just taped a piece of paper over that computer screen.
Eric, oblivious to social cues, decides to go out to the balcony to say hi to Millie. This is a great example of what a terrible actress Candace Cameron is. Do you see these eyebrows? I cut out the rest of the scene there, just look at that shit. SIX eyebrow-raises in TWO sentences. WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS NIGHTMARE.
If you can't read those over-acting lips, she's saying "It's very important for me to have Jack. Don't get in my way."
The next day, Eric and Jack are doing some stretching exercises in their living room when Millie shows up. She claims that she was up all night thinking about Jack, and he isn't terrified by that for some reason. She wants to eat breakfast with Jack on the balcony, but the boys were about to go for a run. Jack puts ho before bro, and then we remember that Shawn also lives here when he comes out to give them "Rocky hats" for their jog. Eric heads out on his own, and Millie expresses interest in the fact that Shawn is "another Hunter".
Anybody watch Supernatural? Witches and Hunters? That's kinda funny. Anyway.
Millie has invited her gothy friends over to see the balcony, and no one has a problem with that. Later, Eric is watching a scary movie by himself when Millie comes into the apartment with a set of keys Jack made for her. Is there an implied time skip there or is Jack just insane? Either way, Eric can smell the trouble but Jack's thinking with the wrong head.
Yeah see these guys know how to use their eyebrows properly. Especially Will Friedle, he's got that single brow raise on LOCK, at the very end there. Eric's character development is practically nonexistent this season, but they definitely still know how to write his humor... except for the last episode... Anyway jack's still not listening.
Back at home, Cory and Topanga are discussing their weekend trip to Pittsburgh, to visit Topanga's parents. It's like a five hour drive from Philly to Pittsburgh, but Cory decided to buy plane tickets instead. Topanga is apparently terrified of flying and Cory sort of makes fun of her for that. It is not exciting.
It's Candace Cameron o'clock again, and she's chanting some stupid spell on Jack's balcony with candles and scarves and shit. I just can't take her seriously.
Why do they have a potted tree growing on their balcony?
Eric hears Millie literally talking to Satan, and confronts her, but just then Jack comes home with "the pizza". Millie slaps Eric and so any one of us can now write the rest of this sce. "He came onto me!" "How could you do that man!" "She's evil man!" "You're just jealous man! We're not friends anymore!"
Yeah that was a pretty spot on prediction, but Eric is able to make it pretty funny.
So yeah, Eric makes Jack choose between them, and of course Jack chooses the one with the boobs. Will does a fantastic job of carrying an otherwise cringe-tastic scene, it's actually really funny. At the end though, Millie states that she is moving in to the apartment. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Oh, "she's only staying for a few days, she's having trouble with her roommates." Fine. Eric makes one last (hilarious) attempt at convincing Jack, but to no avail.
That's such a Shawn thing to say, you know? Like "Oh, there's a witch staying in our apartment. Huh. I wonder what Cory's up to..."
This second opinion convinces Jack to confront Millie, and she admits to being a witch, but plays it off like it's no big deal, like if you met someone who claimed to be Wiccan or whatever, and they're like "oh it's just a belief system~". Anyway it looks like Millie has cast some sort of spell on Jack as he's all wide eyed and expressionless as she tells him they'll be hosting a party the next night.
It is now the next night, All Hallow's Eve. But it's not time for the party just yet. Cory and Topanga board their airplane, one of those reeeeeeeeeal small mini planes, but Cory claims it's a real airline.
Their pilot is named Dexter Jorgensen, who recognizes Cory's name and comments that he went to school with Eric. In fact, Eric tutored Dexter, so this guy's a real dum dum. It's just a mish mash of things for Topanga to be afraid of, all they need is a gremlin on the wing.
In The Backyard, Feeny gives pocket thesauruses and candy to Morgan and her pals. Hell, I'd take a pocket thesaurus. That's awesome. Eric shows up asking Mister Feeny if he can sleep at his place. He immediately says no, but he is curious why Eric is asking.
Feeny advises Eric to find a way to make Jack "hear him", but it hardly matters at this point since Jack is well aware that Millie is a witch.
On the plane, Cory uses an extremely archaic cell phone to call Feeny asking about Jorgensen (since he was a classmate of Eric's), and Feeny tells him not to get on the plane, and then that he'll probably be fine. WHICH IS IT OLD MAN. And now Topanga is flying the plane.
Yeah that's Dexter Jorgensen. You wouldn't want him flying your plane either.
This whole flying thing feels really uninspred and by-the-book. Topanga was afraid? Now Cory's afraid! What a twist! At least Cory is still pretty funny. The Matthews brothers are on fire today.
NOW it's time for that occult party Millie was talking about.
As soon as this scene started, I had to pause the video and just laugh hysterically for a good 30 seconds. You have to hear it to really understand, but I mean, it looks fucking ridiculous for starters, but all the extras are making this like "wooOOooo" sound, and it's so unenthusiastic and phoned-in, it's so absolutely terrible that I just broke down and laughed. Please try to watch this part, oh my god. The best part is that the audience isn't laughing, so it's not intentionally terrible.
That's the best thing I've ever seen. Holy shit. That's an Emmy. Emmys everywhere.
Shawn is having a grand ol time at this shindig though, because that's what Shawn does. And that's why we love him.
You can't NOT love him.
Jack tries to break up with Millie, but she is apparently now Ushkar, Queen of Malevolence, Daughter of Evil. Ushkar and the extras tie up Shawn and Jack. Apparently they need some star to shine into their special crystal, and the apartment's balcony is the perfect place for that to happen. The crystal will reflect the light onto Shawn and Jack and kill them as a sacrifice to Satan or whoever. BUT WAIT!
Eric searches the book for a "counter-spell", but the ritual completes just as he says "ah here it is". The light beam from the crystal hits Eric and does nothing because (according to Eric) he's wearing SPF 50. I can't really tell if that's what the book says is the counterspell, to just wear sunscreen, but that's funnier than Eric lucking into it so let's go with that.
What was the point of Feeny's advice though? Seriously, all Feeny said was to "make him hear you", and that's not what Eric did. At all. That's unusual.
SHE JUST CAN'T CONTROL HER EYEBROWS.
Jack has actually made me laugh a few times this episode, so that's new and exciting. The witches all leave and then Eric and Jack reconcile, due mostly to Eric's big ol heart, and they go off searching for a new party.
During the credits, Eric and Melissa Joan Hart are hanging out on the balcony and then they go out for a bite to each. It's "funny" because, as we all know, Melissa played Sabrina the Teenage Witch, which was in its third season (read as: it wasn't garbage yet) on ABC when this episode aired. For anyone wondering, it was the fifth season of Sabrina where she went to college and nobody cared anymore. Also, it's very obvious how much better Melissa Joan Hart is at acting than Candace Cameron.
I definitely had a big ol' crush on Sabrina. I think everybody did. We never see Cory and Topanga and Dexter Jorgensen again, so it's implied that they all died because Topanga doesn't know how to fly a plane.
Plot: 0.75 - It's obviously not, like, the Breaking Bad kind of good plot, but they were looking for a silly holiday themed story, and in that respect it works. It works a lot better than Cory Wolf. Or maybe it's just because Sabrina was in it.
Character Development: 0.75 - Jack and Eric have their friendship tested, and they end up even stronger friends than before.
Humor: 1.0 - Yeah it's definitely really funny. Watch it just for the humor. Even Cory's side story has its moments.
Life Lesson: 0 - Nothin really to take away from this one, it was just for fun. And that's perfectly fine.
2.5 out of 4.0. Like I said, watch it for the humor. It's an easy watch from start to finish and I thoroughly enjoyed it. And that "woOOooo" part, oh my god. Definitely watch that.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:13:58 GMT
Episode 5x06 "No Guts, No Cory"
Quick history/context lesson, feel free to skip: so, this episode aired on November 7th, 1997. The TGIF lineup at the time was Sabrina -> Boy Meets World -> You Wish -> Teen Angel. I have no idea what those last two are. Apparently You Wish was like a watered down, family-oriented remake of I Dream of Jeannie. TV Guide called it "Hammy, artificial, and altogether excruciating," and it was taken off the air after its seventh episode. Teen Angel was created by two writers/producers from The Simpsons, but it still sucked really bad and was cancelled after 17 episodes. The point is, these four series tried to be cute together on November 7th 1997. In the Sabrina episode, her cat Salem swallows a "time ball" and sends Sabrina back to Mad Men times. Then on Boy Meets World, Salem is wandering the halls of John Adams High, Cory picks him up, and they go back to early 1940's just after the US joined WWII. It makes even less sense if you didn't know about the Sabrina episode, so that's why I wrote all this. And just for completeness, You Wish went back to the 50's, and Teen Angel to 1976. Lesson over.
So Feeny's wrapping up a lesson about Pearl Harbor, and then Cory and Topanga walk out to the hallway together. Apparently Topanga's grandparents got engaged on Pearl Harbor day (December 7th 1941), and they were about Cory and Topanga's age. Shawn does this unfunny bit about actually paying attention in class. Salem the cat wanders over and Cory picks him up, musing "I wonder what it was like during World War II." So now we're there.
I guess we already saw in 5x05 that Boy Meets World and Sabrina exist in the same universe, so we've at least slightly built up to the idea of Salem being here. But I guess they also share a universe with Teen Angel and You Wish. We already knew we had a god from Cult Fiction, and Teen Angel confirms that, but also witches and genies. Very rich lore, here in the Boy Meets World universe.
But I'm the only one who cares about that shit, so let's move on. Apparently it is exactly Pearl Harbor day as Feeny walks into the hall and announces from, I guess it's a telegram, that the US has entered the war, although without mention of Pearl Harbor being attacked. Shawn strolls up and announces that he's going to go enlist in the army and asks Cory to come with him. Don't worry Cory, you probably would have been drafted anyway. ...Then the theme song plays, which is... weird timing....
At home, everything has been 50's-ified. We learn that Cory did indeed enlist and Eric, well, he tried.
Topanga arrives, and is horrified to learn that Cory's going to war. At Chubbie's (or whatever it is right now) there's a bunch of army guys in their uniforms having a grand ol time, and some women are singing Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy, a song that I actually know because we danced to it fairly often at my high school's Swing Club. We see that our boys have the Big Red One of the 1st Infantry Division, who were ultimately the first to land on Omaha Beach in Normandy on D-Day. So that's pretty cool.
Jack shows up, he is also in the 1st. So everybody's going except Feeny and Eric. There really isn't a whole lot to talk about here. Feeny wishes them all good luck or whatever, and tells them to write an essay on their "summer in Europe", even though it's December. It's time to leave and it looks like Alan is leading the Big Red One, but Topanga arrives on the scene and Cory wants a quick word with her.
Those lips were made for the 40's. He proposes and she says yes.
At The War, everybody's hanging up mementos of their loved ones and Jack's got a giant framed picture of Eric. It's funny on its own, but they milk the "everyone thinks he's gay" thing way too hard. Like, yeah, we get the implication, you don't need to throw it in our faces. It would have been way more funny if they kept it subtle. Mail arrives and Cory gets a perfumey letter from Topanga, and it's just some romancey stuff. Yawn. The sound effects of combat begin, and before they rush out to fight Cory tells Shawn to marry Topanga in his stead if he dies. It's really overly dramatic, this whole thing is trying really hard to be dramatic, like the worst thing that happened in World War 2 was that some guys didn't make it back to their girlfriends.
Well it was only a matter of time until they made that joke. Amy is sad about missing her kids, but it's hard to give a shit since none of this actually matters. At least we get to see Eric do this thing.
Inside the house, Salem is trying to call Sabrina on the phone, but she doesn't answer.
Back at The War, we're in a foxhole with the soldiers and we're supposed to feel bad for Cory some more. They turn on the radio and learn that the war in Europe has ended, which happened in April and early May of 1945. I guess Salem's been trying to call Sabrina for several years now. So Shawn, Cory, and Alan all survived the Normandy invasion (which is obviously not mentioned). Cory is an idiot so he rushes out of the foxhole to go back to Philly and is promptly blown up by a low budget explosion. The audience doesn't laugh, so once again we're going for heavy handed drama and it's just boringggggggg. I understand that we're in a war here, but I mean M.A.S.H was funny and interesting and set in a war, so it's definitely possible.
At home, everyone's having trouble with the lack of a Cory, and Shawn decides it's time to propose to Topanga like he promised. She slaps him, but then accepts when he says it's what Cory wanted. But he's still getting some disapproving glares from everyone else.
Woah now, that's a little racy for ABC. But it's also very Shawn. It's one of the very few funny moments in this episode.
Amy is certain that Cory's still out there, and asks Eric to go to Europe to find him. Once again, the audience doesn't laugh when I feel like they should. Now we're in Paris, where a beatnik looking Cory is making out with some "French" woman in a restaurant. He's got amnesia.
Apparently Cory has a dream every night about some girl, but he doesn't remember who she is. This is really boring. Shawn and Topanga are about to get married, Eric and Jack find Cory here in Paris, and the French girl wants to marry Cory.
I'm not leaving anything out here, Topanga literally just shows up at the restaurant in France in her wedding dress, and awakens Cory's memory with a big ol kiss. Even though the entire duration of World War II has passed, the characters are all back at high school during the credits. 40's Cory is about to propose to 40's Topanga again for some reason, and then we jump back to 1997 and I still understand nothing.
Plot: 0 - Garbage.
Character Development: 0 - Garbage.
Humor: 0.5 - A recycling bin.
Life Lesson: 0 - A garbage truck.
0.5 out of 4.0. Don't even think of wasting your time with this monstrosity. MAYBE if Sabrina showed up at some point it could have been at least remotely enjoyable, but that didn't happen. This might be the worst episode in the entire series. And not even the good kind of bad, like the one with the cherry bomb. I can't even get mad about how bad this is, I'm just depressed and disappointed. Not bad like a Michael Bay film where at least there's explosions and shit, just mindlessly empty and bland. This episode is an unsalted, stale cracker.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:15:30 GMT
Episode 5x07 "I Love You Donna Karan (Part 1)" Donna Karan is apparently a fashion designer. She must be the designer of Angela's purse, otherwise I have no idea what the title means. Back in 5x02, we met a student named Angela in "Mister Feeny's film class", who pointed out that Cory's project looked a lot like The Real World. I don't think we've seen her since then, so that was odd timing, but here she is again on a Chubbie's date with Shawn Hunter. Cory and Topanga watch from the sidelines, which should probably make them uncomfortable. Topanga mentions how great Shangela are, but Cory reminds her of Shawn's Two Week Rule. Apparently Shawn only ever dates a girl for two weeks, and that time has come with Angela. Angela's being extremely pragmatic about the whole thing, to Shawn's surprise, and it seems like he's having a harder time letting go than she is. Topanga thinks Shawn's Two Week Rule is stupid, and claims that Shawn is afraid of commitment. Ahh the bromance. Love love love it. I'll ship Cory and Shawn over Shawn and Angela any day of the week. Topanga reads Shawn the Riot Act, explaining how he'll spend the rest of his life alone, which is nonsense on its own since they're seventeen, but Shawn's already kissing some new girl off to the side. At school, the boys find a purse that's been left in the hallway. They ask Mr. Feeny who runs the lost and found and, of course, he does. It's self aware though, as he points out that he also teaches history, english, and film. So that's funny. Not wishing to burden Feeny any further, the boys decide to just put up a notice for the purse, and then Shawn starts digging through it for a wallet or ID. What he finds instead is a book of sonnets with a ticket stub for a Van Damme movie. Shawn comments that he would "give her two weeks," and honestly, I've dated for less. In The Backyard, Eric's looking for help with his studying from Mister Feeny, but the old man thinks it's time for Eric to do these sorts of things on his own. Eric thinks it's "Kevin McDougal, the kid from the other side," which is hilarious, and also sort of self aware in the sense that we've always ignored the existence of their other neighbors. Back at The Apartment, Eric's freaking out trying to study, and he's got Jack quizzing him about the Louisiana Purchase. I am IN LOVE with that joke. Is that just me? This has stuck with me since the very first time I saw it. It's hard to put my finger on why exactly, but it's absolutely hysterical to me. Jack abandons Eric to study on his own. Our boy can't remember the name Marco Polo, and keeps saying "Marco..." for way longer than is necessary until an imaginary Feeny appears and says "Polo". Jack wanders back in since Eric's talking to nobody, and they spend like six hours on this bit where Eric tries to explain who he's talking to. If nothing else, we get one of the most important lines in the series. We would be lost in the darkness without that line. Eric's only sayin what we were all thinkin. But now we know. Meanwhile, Jack mostly just makes this face and makes sure everyone at home knows what a crazy guy Eric is. I think that's the perfect picture to describe Jack's function in season 5. In the background they've still got that same piece of paper taped to the computer screen as in the Witches episode. Anyway Imagi-Feeny takes Eric to the library to study. At Chubbie's, Cory finds Shawn reading that book of sonnets from The Purse. Cory wants to fix Shawn up with Topanga's friend Debbie, because he and Topanga want Shawn to experience the "warm feeling of meeting someone special". I think Shawn realizes how silly that notion is, but Corpanga are well known for tearing down the walls of Relationship Reality, so he goes along with it. In the living room at Cory's house, Shawn is rocking out to some classical music that he found in The Purse. Cory points out that Shawn hates classical music, but Shawn explains that he just never gave it a chance. THE TRANSFORMATION HAS BEGUN. I knew I recognized the music, and it took me a few minutes, but it's Vivaldi's Spring, at this part youtu.be/8eJoydTJDio?t=1m56s. And it does rock. So let's talk about this. How do we feel about this changing Shawn? I definitely like this classical music part. Classical music obviously isn't something we associate with Shawn, but his response is still totally believable. He's not appreciating the, I don't know, the finer points of composition, he's just rocking out. I mean that's exactly what I do when I hear this song. If the goal is to make Shawn more mature or broaden his horizons, that is how they should do it, where they retain his goofiness. Cory suggests that Shawn ditch all the air-violin, assuming it won't go over well with this Debbie person. Debbie and Topanga arrive, and Debbie... is an airhead. An airhead with no time for sonnets or Vivaldi. Even though everyone should love Vivaldi solely because of his name. What a pleasant surprise though, that Debbie is played by Maggie Lawson, who I know as Juliet O'Hara on Psych. Shawn and Debbie aren't getting along, so Shawn pulls some chocolate out of The Purse because he's a stress eater, apparently. Almost all of you know how this ends, that it's Angela's purse, so I'm confused why Topanga doesn't recognize it here. Probably just an oversight by the staff. Anyway Shawn is unhappy so he storms out of the house with The Purse. The point of this scene was that Debbie is the exact kind of girl Shawn was looking for in previous seasons, and now we're seeing firsthand that he's starting to want something more. And to turn down Maggie Lawson he's gotta be seriously caught up on this mystery girl. At school the next day, Shawn is the bubbliest we've ever seen him. His best friend is perplexed, and Shawn claims to have that special tingly feeling that Cory gets with Topanga, and he feels it for the owner of The Purse. Okay throw on the breaks, this train has reached its final destination in Crazytown. Fortunately, Cory isn't a dumbass in this episode. Even though he and Topanga did a totally bullcrap love thing in season 4, he thinks that Shawn's totally bullcrap love thing in this episode is nonsense. Shawn won't listen though. At The Apartment, Eric's riding the elevator with Invisi-Feeny and we learn that Eric managed a B on the test, which is absolutely stunning. He gets home, and it turns out that Jack did worse than Eric on this test. Jack tries to talk to Fake-Feeny in probably the least funny scene with Jack to date. The camera is way too wide, Matthew Lawrence isn't into it at all, and the writing is lazy. Shawn shows up at Cory's kitchen just as Cory completes a composite sketch of The Purse's owner, based on its contents. I guess it does sort of look like Angela, with the brown curly hair. I'm not sure if they were trying to be cute there or not. Doesn't matter though, since The Purse's owner left a message at Shawn's apartment saying to meet her at Chubbie's so she can get it back. Shawn's terrified of losing this tingly feeling. He doesn't want to look behind the curtain, so he says he's not gonna go to Chubbie's. Shawn's hair looks fucking amazing right now... Hm? Oh, right, yeah, I wasn't expecting something so emotional here. That's pretty powerful stuff. We are fully aware of Shawn's abandonment issues, which we now know are only made worse by people abandoning his father as well. So he keeps his Two Week Rule to avoid reaching the point where he can be abandoned. And I think that's a great direction to take this. Shawn's abandonment issues are firmly grounded, we've seen them being built up from the very beginning. And now he's afraid of being abandoned by this girl he idolizes. Good stuff. Topanga shows up, and still doesn't recognize the purse. You would think that Angela would have at least mentioned to Topanga that she lost her purse. Cory makes a speech about love and shit, and Shawn looks prepared to go to Chubbie's. It's extremely annoying how high Cory's high horse is when it comes to love. DON'T YOU WANT THIS SHAWN? THIS IS REAL LOVE. WE'RE SO HAPPY BLAH BLAH BLAH. At The Apartment, Eric is abandoned by Feeny-Geist. He's leaving Eric on his own now, apparently heading out to Nevada. It's actually heart-breaking to watch. That's Eric saying that second line, if you can't see it. He says it to himself, it's a real tear jerker. Now we're at Chubbie's for the fateful meeting. Shawn puts on Vivaldi's Spring on the fucking jukebox, which I don't even need to comment on. A leg-tastic stunner of a woman walks down the stairs into Chubbie's, and it looks like she's here for The Purse. Her boyfriend comes in shortly after, and Shawn is still under the impression that she is the owner of The Purse, so he makes a bee line for the exit. Miss Legs picks up The Purse as the scene fades out. At school, Shawn pretty much screams at Cory for telling him to put his heart on the line, now that he's completely crushed and in pain. All Cory can do is try to apologize, but Shawn storms off. Somebody with a lot of time should go back and count how many times I've said that Shawn storms off. At least twenty by now, surely. ...Oh. Well. It's not Angela's purse. That shows what the fuck I know about Boy Meets World. It was actually Legs's purse. That also explains why Topanga didn't recognize it. I'll own up to it and not go back and change what I wrote, but... crap... My memory failed me. Regardless, all of the contents of the purse were indeed Angela's, as we learn here in this last scene. And that's really what was important. That's Legs McGee there on the right. I'll be saying this 90% of the time, but I have no idea what Angela's doing with her hair. Much more important than all that is Topanga's expression during these events. Yeah there's your new desktop background. So Cory and Topanga are all excited now that they know Shawn's been falling in love with Angela's stuff, and we'll see how that plays out in Part 2. During the credits, Jack is still trying to talk to Genie-Feeny. Eric says he'll help Jack study, and asks him a quiz question about Poe's The Raven. That little head turn is perfect. Plot: 0.5 - IIIIIII dunno what to give it, honestly. Am I biased because I already knew how it would turn out? On the other hand, is there anyone on Earth who wasn't able to figure out that it would be Angela? The beginning made it too obvious. I dunno. My feelings might be a lot different if I were seeing this for the first time. Character Development: 1.0 - Just for "every time a woman walks out because he's not good enough." That's some serious crap right there. And Eric finally moving on from Feeny's assistance is pretty significant. Humor: 1.0 - Even with Jack's short comings, the whole thing was still really funny. I've talked about this Cory/Shawn dynamic before, where Shawn is dealing with emotional stuff and Cory gets to be silly in the background. As usual, it worked wonderfully. Life Lesson: 0 - Don't fall in love with a purse. |
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:19:09 GMT
Episode 5x08 "Chasing Angela (Part 2)"
Shawn is on another date at Chubbie's. You know, I'm surprised that Shawn's most significant reputation is as a playboy. He really ought to be known as the guy who takes girls to Chubbie's. Shawn's date is doing an obnoxious cheer that just spells out his name, and some extras in the background are staring.
So that's about par for the course, but as we saw in the last episode, Shawn is growing past this stuff. On the other side of the restaurant are Angela and her date, some guy telling the story of how he “saved the day” at a football game. Then he asks her if she wants to make out. Angela is as bored as Shawn, and we're supposed to react like “wow they would be totally not bored if they were together,” which I guess is true if we accept everything from the last episode.
On yet another side of the restaurant are Cory and Topanga, who clearly never have anything to do besides watch Shawn go on dates. They've been doing this pretty consistently. Cory wants to interfere and tell Shawn that the contents of The Purse belonged to Angela, citing “this is the woman of his dreams, the woman he could spend the rest of his life with.” Is that right, Cory? Because last episode you told Shawn he was stupid for falling in love with a purse. Topanga insists that he stay out of it though, since Shawn demanded at the end of 5x07 that Cory stay out of his personal life. But Cory, of course, doesn't listen. He detaches Shawn from the lips of the aspiring cheerleader and tells him about Angela and The Purse. Between the little summary Cory gives now and the “last time on Boy Meets World” at the beginning, there was no reason to even watch the last episode. Shawn has a surprisingly rational response to this news.
Okay when I said “rational” I meant half rational. I like that he's going back to his actual experience instead of saying “Oh Angela is the purse girl? Now I love Angela!” So that part is rational, but thinking that he would have fallen in love with Angela after two weeks is not so rational. Then again, if we accept the previous episode, then Shawn is capable of loving very quickly. So under that premise this is a well thought out response. It doesn't matter though since Cory responds with his special brand of nonsense.
Ohhhhhhhhhh mannnnnnnnn. First of all, “everything you've ever wanted”? Try everything he's wanted since the last episode. But this show has a habit of turning a single episode into ALL OF HISTORY. Second, what the frickety frack!? Cory is revoltingly pretentious about love at this point in the show. I miss the good old days when Cory was so sure he knew nothing about anything. That was easy to relate to and identify with. But now he's supposed to sound wise and it doesn't work at all.
Shawn goes over to Angela's table, and she's not making out with her date. I'm kind of disappointed by that, honestly. If Shawn can kiss his date and not care, why can't she? As always, I am confused by her hair.
Everything else aside, she is a pretty good actress. And if I didn't know the future, I probably wouldn't have a problem with her at this point. She's at least got some hobbies, unlike Jack. Shawn starts giggling and looks back at Cory who reminds him to “look into her eyes”. Shawn does so, and is left speechless. And so it begins. Cory is going to be completely unbearable after this...
At school the next day, Cory's got this shit-eating grin and says “hey hey, Shawny's in love!” Yup, unbearable. Shawn's afraid to talk to Angela though, so he hides in the janitor's closet. Joining us now is Topanga Lawrence with a bunch of anniversary balloons from Cory. He also claims to have made reservations at some restaurant. WOW CORY. MISTER MASTER OF LOVE AND HAPPINESS OVER HERE, with this boring ass balloons and dinner anniversary plan. You're all talk and no game, Cory. No game. And there's probably a timeline issue with their anniversary being this early in the season, but what does it even matter at this point. God, look at me. I've been broken. They've broken my continuity-loving spirit.
Now Topanga's being unbearable as well, “awww that's so sweet”, “that's so cute”, talking about Shawn's nervousness, not the balloons. Doesn't seem like she cares about the balloons. But she should, because the world is running out of Helium. Angela comes over and asks Shawn if he wants to get food later, and also gives him a seashell that she claims reminded her of him. Hell of a better gift than balloons.
At The Apartment, Jack's finishing up a phone call with his mother, who has informed him that she and Jack's stepdad are going on a cruise during Thanksgiving. Jack comments that he'll have to have Thanksgiving all alone. Except that's not true because he could easily have Thanksgiving with Shawn. I swear, 90% of the time the writers forget that Shawn lives in this apartment too. Their whole brotherhood storyline completely vanished after those first two episodes. Anyway Jack asks to eat with Eric and his family, and ultimately they decide to host Thanksgiving for everybody there at the apartment. While all this happening, Eric makes himself a peanut butter and cereal sandwich, which calls back a joke from a past season where Morgan was making silly cereal sandwiches. It's subtle, though, and I appreciate that.
Back at John Adams, Shawn's taken up residence in that janitor's closet where he is currently reviewing his “black book” of girls' phone numbers.
Hmmmm.... IS MORGAN IN THERE? Or maybe it's Grandma Matthews.
This scene is more of Cory being the Love Guru, while Shawn's scared of giving up everyone in his book for a relationship with Angela. He says that a committed relationship is a new and foreign concept to him, but I thought that changed with Dana back in season 3. Honestly I'm still rooting for Shawn and Dana. But in the end, he realizes that the only person in the book he really cares about is Angela.
Now Jack and Eric are up to some WILD AND CRAZY ANTICS. Eric is trying to make an ice sculpture of a turkey and Jack made some shitty pumpkin pie.
Even when it's Jack doing something silly, they still rely on Eric for the punchline.
Jack starts to freak out, but Eric assures him that his family doesn't care about Thanksgiving very much. Just then, Alan shows up and tells the boys a story about how much Thanksgiving means to him. It is “the most important day of the year”. And then he leaves. Isn't that what telephones are for? That was a waste of gas, Alan. Think about the environment.
Time for a Chubbie's date. Shawn is playing Vivaldi's Spring on the jukebox, the same thing he did at the end of the last episode. He's recreating the same date he tried to have while returning The Purse. It's clear that Angela doesn't know about Shawn and The Purse yet though. AND YOU KNOW WHAT? That's ridiculous! Nosy ass Cory and Topanga, getting in everybody's everything, never bothered to tell Angela that Shawn already knows all this shit about her? “Aww they're a match made in heaven, even though he went through all her shit and she doesn't know about it.” And the girl whose purse it was never bothered to mention who this guy was that found her purse? Bah, I say! Bah!
Turns out that Angela is still going out with that football guy, but luckily Cory is waiting in the wings and advises Shawn to just tell Angela how he feels. You need to brace yourself for this one.
I could write a BOOK on that line right there, “Why can't we be Cory and Topanga?” It says so much about Shawn's character and where his character arcs have taken him. Hidden in that line is the question “Why can't I have what Cory has?” and that is MASSIVE! HUUUUUUUUGE! “Why can't I have a real home, and real parents, and a real brother, and a real romance, and go to college...” Every step of the way, Shawn feels like he's got the knockoff brand compared to Cory. And if Cory weren't so smug about the whole thing this could have actually been amazing.
Unfortunately, Angela just says she's sorry and has to go.
At school the next day, Shawn's falling apart and tells Cory he's just gonna go back to using his black book.
Which reminds me that there was a BBC comedy called Black's Books. Funny show. Anybody seen that?
Shawn is being realistic about all this, saying hey, I tried, I got hurt, time to let go, Angela doesn't want what I want. I'm gonna directly quote Cory's response to that: “She doesn't know what she wants. I know what she wants.” The audience doesn't laugh at that or anything. That's his most infuriating line yet. And then he tells Shawn a story about how he kissed Topanga when they were four years old. It has nothing to do with anything, and also bull fucking shit he did. I can't handle this episode you guys. I have never hated Cory so much. Shawn reacts to this story with “I want what you have,” and Cory replies “Then go get it.” Ughhhhhhhhh.
Another Chubbie's date, it's Angela and that football guy from the beginning again, his name is Ted. Shawn interrupts their date and Ted offers Shawn a french fry. I like this guy, I'm gonna be honest. He's really cool and funny for this whole scene. Shawn's busy trying to explain to Angela why they're perfect for each other, but I can't even focus on it because his leather jacket is making so much noise. I'm not kidding, watch this scene, all you can hear is his jacket. Ted takes his fries and bails because he's the coolest guy on this show, and Angela looks like she's been convinced to go out with Shawn again.
We're at a restaurant called Barelli's now, where Cory has made reservations for Shangela, and this is also where Topanga will be joining him for their anniversary dinnner because god forbid Shawn go on a date without Cory. Also their waiter is the stylist from Hair Today Goon Tomorrow (EDIT No he's not. They're not even remotely similar looking. I am an idiot). Corpanga arrive and Cory just stares at Shawn and Angela the whole time. Frustrated with Cory's ridiculous behavior, Topanga yells “What's happening to us?”
So she's not as completely insane as Cory, and is equally annoyed by him as I am. Shawn and Angela both feel like this place is too fancy, so they order burgers because they want to “be themselves”. Shawn claims he has no idea what he's doing, which is pretty damn clear. Topanga and Cory start yelling at each other because Toperarkldajklsdf doesn't want to be an old married couple at 17. They cool off and Cory claims that he was only doing all this nonsense because he thought that's what she wanted, which is just a HUGE fucking lie. Agreeing to actually behave like they're 17, they knock everything off the table and start making out on top of it. It might even be funny if I thought this relationship made any sense at all. NAUSEA WARNING: Angela comments that she wants “what they have” and she kisses Shawn. Thank god this scene is over now.
It's Thanksgiving time now at The Apartment, and all the boys have is “an Easter basket and a Santa Claus”. Now everybody arrives and oh look Thanksgiving isn't ruined since they all brought the food.
FINALLY, IT HAS HAPPENED. TODAY IS THE DAY OF LEGEND. A DAY OF MOURNING, AND YET OF NEW HOPE. TODAY, MORGAN WAS OVERALL LESS ANNOYING THAN CORY. LIGHT THE BEACONS!
Plot: 0.25 – Pfffffff
Character Development: 0.5 – Cory sucks. Bad. But Shawn has entered a serious relationship, and whether we like it or not, it is development.
Humor: 0.5 – Eric, as always, was hilarious, but he didn't get a lot of screen time.
Life Lesson: 0 – Easier zero than the time travel episode.
1.25 out of 4.0. It sucks. Watching it only made me angry. Cory was genuinely insufferable. That's not what we watch this show for. We don't want Hollywood romance and star-crossed lovers. This was a huge step backward.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:24:29 GMT
Episode 5x09 "How To Succeed in Business"
John Adams High has apparently instituted a "work study program". We don't get any more detail than that. Our heroes are working in the mail room for a big advertising agency, and, naturally, Shawn is goofing off while Cory takes his mail-sorting duties very seriously. There's another guy in here, real old fellow who's been working in this mail room for 43 years. He's supposed to serve as this ominous "you better impress somebody and get promoted or you'll end up like me" symbol, and hey, it's working. He must have Alzheimer's though, because he did have another job as the original announcer of Oahu Beach Face Savers Presents Knowledge Fever in 4x19.
Shawn comments that he likes this old guy, and Cory's smug, stupid self explains how he himself should be Shawn's role model, not this old guy. Indeed, this corporate world is Cory's "essence", or so he claims.
Look at 'im, wearin a t-shirt with a sweater vest... He's worn that almost every episode this season and it makes him look him a chump.
Upstairs on the senior management floor, we see a sign on the wall that reads "Keller-Marsden Advertising". I can't find anyone with the name Keller involved in the show, although April Kelly was one of the creators, and we can only hope that the other name is a throwback to Jason Marsden. As they deliver the mail, a phone rings at an empty desk, setting today's plot in motion.
Shawn handles an angry client with a surprising level of skill, and the vice president of the company overhears the conversation. His "temp didn't show up today" and so he wants Shawn to replace him. I don't know jack about business, but if you ask ten VP's how they would feel about Shawn answering that phone, you would probably get ten different answers, so I'm willing to accept that this is possible.
At home, Eric (why is Eric even here?) interrupts his mother watching a soap opera, telling her that she desperately needs to get a life and go do something productive.
Amy is compelled to go do... something. This is one of those shots that you probably have to be in the biz to understand. We know there's a TV in the living room, they could have easily done this scene on the couch, so why do it in the kitchen with this tiny little TV? I could throw out some guesses, but for the most part it's a mystery.
Back at Keller Marsden, Shawn's still performing well. In fact, the VP has asked Shawn to put together a pitch for a toothpaste ad targeted toward teenagers. Shawn and Cory are the only teenagers working at this place, so it's still believable that he would ask for Shawn's ideas. Cory insists that a thorough depiction of bacteria and gingivitis is the angle to take, but Shawn's pretty sure he should do an ad about how fresh breath is sexy. As he heads into the VP's office, it's left ambiguous which direction Shawn's going to take. Does he trust himself more than he trusts Cory? That's a pretty interesting question.
Now we're in Eric and Jack's creative writing class, and Mrs. Amy Matthews arrives on the scene. She's not being weird or anything, and Jack thinks she's pretty cool, but Eric is extremely uncomfortable. Especially when she tries to make small talk with his girlfriend.
Girlfriend girl is played by Alissa Ann Smego, who didn't have many other roles, and actually "passed away unexpectedly" last October. That's a shame.
This looks promising though. We've really only explored the parent-child relationships with Alan, and now we get to see Eric interact with his mother.
Topanga is visiting Cory during her lunch break, and makes a comment about a senator, so her work-study has her in... DC... somehow... Either way, she's excelling the same way Shawn is, leaving Cory in the dust. Just before leaving, she comments that Cory should keep looking out for Shawn because "he really looks up to you." WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE! Cory and Topanga are like this inter-dependent conceit-monster. They are disgustingly self absorbed this season. She leaves, though, and is quickly replaced by Shawn, who explains that he went with the sexy fresh breath idea, and it was well received. So he did trust himself more than Cory, and that's great to see. As he turns to leave again, Shawn comments "I guess you're not the only one with good ideas."
That's awesome that Shawn realizes that he can have good ideas, that he doesn't have to rely on Cory. My only gripe is that we already saw Shawn's aptitude for business in the Bed 'n Breakfast episode. Even Feeny said that Shawn had a future there, and now they won't even mention it. Can anybody think of a good reason why that is? Why don't they even mention it?
The creative writing class claps for Eric as he finishes reading his work, and it's Amy's turn up next. Her story is the seemingly non-fictional account of her honeymoon. "Alan walked toward me and I began to tremble" is where Eric starts to freak out, and the scene fades over to Keller-Marsden before we get any of the juicy details. So the question becomes, can Eric see his mother as a person, a human, a wife, instead of just seeing her as his mommy.
The last four paragraphs started with T. This one makes 5. That's not very good. Try to diversify your writing, folks. Trust me on that.
It's time for Cory to answer a ringing phone, but he screws it all up. The client gets pissed and threatens to move his account to another agency, leaving Cory to get fired. At home, Alan tries to console his curly haired son, but it's extremely hard for me as a viewer to feel any kind of sympathy for this guy.
They must be trying to make us hate Cory. What a terrible person. Alan seriously underreacts by telling his son to give Shawn "a little more credit". We were primed and ready for an Alan Matthews Lesson here, but it didn't happen. Shawn shows up a little later, having recovered the account that Cory almost lost as well as convincing the VP to re-hire Cory. Wow, Cory absolutely does not deserve this guy as a best friend. Damn it, this paragraph started with T too.
Unfortunately for Cory, he's gotta work as a janitor now. He's janitoring the senior management floor when Shawn comes over with the finished toothpaste ad.
Shawn is 100% humble about the whole thing, and seems genuinely distressed that his best buddy is stuck working as a janitor. This episode is making me question my shipping of Cory and Shawn... It's starting to seem like a one-way relationship.
At The Apartment, Eric is swappin spit with his girlfriend from class. The audience manages to withhold their "oooOOOOoo" this time, which I always appreciate. Jack comes home with Amy in tow, since she's going to help him with the current writing assignment.
I feel like with a lot of these gifs, some of the impact is lost since Eric's inflection is important to a lot of his jokes, but either way it's still funny.
Eric yells that college is supposed to be his time, untainted by the presence of his parents. Amy loves her son and doesn't want to make him uncomfortable, even though she really wants to write. So she goes home, leaving Jack to, I don't know, flounder his way through the assignment. Jack is the real victim here.
At home, Feeny gives an Emmy deserving performance as he reads some of Amy's work. It wouldn't translate to a gif at all, so be sure to check that out around 16 minutes. The Eric story comes to a close now, as he comes downstairs and tells his mother to come back to class because she's a good writer. Well that wasn't as profound as I'd hoped for. I mean, she was reading stories out loud about having sex with his father. I really can't blame Eric for being uncomfortable.
As Cory and Topanga arrive at The Apartment for a dinner with Shangela, we discover that Cory has been blatantly lying to Topanga about work when she comments "I know it's awkward for you to be doing so much better than Shawn". I hate you, Cory. Inside, the ruse starts to fall apart when Shawn gets a fax on the machine the company gave him.
Let's all jot down in our Boy Meets World notebooks that we have definitive proof of Cory lying to Topanga. We're going to come back to that later in the season.
Next Shawn gets a call on his new cellphone, and Angela mentions that the company also give him a credit card, and Cory breaks. He shows Topanga that all he's received from the company is his ring of janitor's keys. I'm not sure why he has those right now. Anyway, everything comes to light now. Shawn says it feels really good that he's doing something on his own for once (forgetting about the B 'n B, of course), and he's overall calm and level-headed and understanding. He really is a way better friend than Cory deserves right now.
YEAH SURE LET'S MAKE THIS ALL ABOUT CORY. Shut up, Topanga.
And there's also the slight issue that IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME. Cory spent the entire second season being jealous of Shawn! That's what I fucking loved about this show, they were both screw-ups/failures who were both jealous of each other for different reasons, with different skillsets, trying to make their way together. But now the whole message is "Shawn is finally becoming as good as Cory," and nobody wants that. I sure don't. That being said, Shawn does go off in his own direction again in future episodes, but for right now, I don't like it.
During the credits, Amy reads a story about giving birth to Eric, and the second-hand embarrassment is so strong that I can barely even watch it.
Plot: 0.75 - I liked it for the same reason I liked the B 'n B episode. It's fun to watch Shawn be good at things. And because I hate Cory right now, it was also fun to watch him fail.
Character Development: 1.0 - Even though the "I'm as good as you!" thing pisses me off, Shawn is making progress with his lack of self worth.
Humor: 0.75 - Once again, Eric deserves a lot of the credit. The old guy was funny too.
Life Lesson: 0 - Don't be like Cory. That's this review's life lesson, don't be like Cory. But as for this episode, I can't really think of anything.
2.5 out of 4.0. It definitely felt more like a sitcom than the last two episodes, without all the TRUE LOVE crap. That made it enjoyable for me, not having to deal with all that crap I hate. But "You don't have all that crap I hate" wouldn't really sell at Hallmark. And honestly, looking back, when does Cory succeed without Shawn? When are all these times that Cory keeps talking about? Yeah Shawn screws up most of the time, but either Cory screws up too or he's not even involved. They took that relationship inferiority complex from the last two episodes, and tried to expand it into an overall inferiority complex, and it doesn't really match up with the history. But then, it never does.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:25:00 GMT
Episode 5x10 "Last Tango in Philly"
During the theme song we all hate, Cory and Topanga take the ALS ice bucket challenge.
As always, the content of the previous episode does not matter anymore. The work-study program no longer exists as we see Angela and Topanga working at a Mexican restaurant. It's their first night on the job, so their boyfriends have decided to heckle them and act like obnoxious customers. The results are hilarious. Who could have ever thought that Shawn and Cory goofing off together would have positive results? The lads wanna hang out with their lasses after work, but the lasses have already decided to go dancing with people from work. An invitation to join them is extended, but Cory and Shawn resolve to go to the gym instead.
Topanga and Angela are approached by two of their coworkers, handsome men with Latino accents named Sergio and Nunzio, asking if they are still coming dancing with them tonight. As you can imagine, Cory and Shawn aren't happy with this situation. At school the next day, they're a bit worried about what happened the night before.
Topangela come up and tease the boys about being jealous of the Latin male models, but insist that they've done nothing wrong. I agree with that, but I'm pretty progressive. I totally understand why a lot of guys wouldn't be comfortable with this. The boys refuse to show their jealousy, deciding to hit the gym until they can "beat the zippers off of Sergio and Nunzio."
I suppose it is now time for these zippers to be beaten off as our heroes arrive at the restaurant, which, by the way, is just Chubbie's with some decorations. But you probably guessed that already.
This is beautiful. It feels like Boy Meets World again. The Shawn and Cory show.
We get some fun antics here at the restaurant and a confrontation with the handsome Nunzio. Nunzio is clearly very jealous of Cory for being Topanga's boyfriend, but he's not trying to steal her or anything, no matter how much Cory believes it.
In The Backyard, Alan's setting up his new satellite dish while Feeny finishes up a little gardening. Eric joins the scene to hold the ladder for his father while he climbs up to the roof. And then a strange woman named Katherine wanders into the shot, and Feeny calls out to her.
This is two houses' back yard. What is she doing in here? That is not a place for people to be idly walking around. Apparently she's headed to Starbucks and totally wants a piece of Feeny's hot ass, but he's oblivious to the flirting and sends her on her way. Eric then explains that she was asking him out. We haven't had much Feeny/Eric interaction this season, apart from that imaginary Feeny, so, again, it's feeling like the good old days.
We're at the gym now, and there's some large, black letters on the wall spelling out "THE GYM", so I'm fairly sure that's where we are. Cory and Shawn use their anger at Nunzio to motivate their weight-lifting, and some jacked women nearby compliment them on their progress. I'm not sure if they have German or Russian accents, it's one of those intimidating ones. Cory calls the restaurant from the gym's payphone to check up on Topanga, but it's closed. For some reason, the answering machine informs Cory that Nunzio, Sergio, Topanga, and Angela can be reached at "The Boom Boom Room". The only conceivable reason for that is that Nunzio predicted Cory would call, and is taunting him.
Cory's now waiting outside Topanga's house for her to get home from dancing at The Boom Boom Room. He does his whole jealous-boyfriend thing, ending with forbidding Topanga to see Nunzio again. The next day, it's THE GYM time again. The jacked girls walk in and greet our heroes, who return the greeting. Apparently their names are Sonja and Cookie. But only Sonja has lines, the same way that only Nunzio has lines and not Sergio. It's odd, honestly, but I guess it saves the show some money. Cory and Shawn talk it over, and decide that the best solution to their problem is to do the same sort of thing to Topangela, by taking Sonja and Cookie to dinner at their restaurant.
Just before they arrive, we see Topangela and Nunzio talking about how men are idiots, and Nunzio admits that he'd feel pretty awful if his girlfriend went dancing with someone as good looking as he is.
Real talk, Nunzio is hilarious. Can we replace Jack with Nunzio? Him and Eric could have some very real adventures together. The writers really messed up on this one. He should at least be a recurring character. Anyway, Cory and Shawn show up with their "dates" and the whole thing blows up in their faces.
Angpanga are pissed, and now Sonja and Cookie are pissed, even though Cookie doesn't have any lines. Jack and Eric are in The Backyard instead of their apartment, and apparently he's screwed things up with his girlfriend-of-the-episode, Lucy.
One of the few solid Jack-jokes in the series. And of course Eric closes it out with his legendary eyebrows.
Feeny joins the scene, returning home from a date with that Katherine woman from before. He inadvertently insulted her poetry and now he's here, confused how things went so wrong. We hear Amy shouting from inside, "It's either me or that satellite dish." I hardly think this issue is serious enough for an ultimatum, it's only been like a day and a half, but fine. Either way, Alan joins the men outside, as do Cory and Shawn shortly after. They're all lamenting their inability to understand women and what they want, except Eric who's actually been the most logical one so far.
The scene fades over to some dance club as the manly men try to brainstorm an answer to their problems. The dance club is "TV full", a phrase I've invented to mean "let's pretend it's full, since we have to move a camera around in there". Like all of the school dances on this show, right, those were "TV full". Anyway, we see that the gang is all here, Topangelanga, Nunzio, Amy, and even Feeny's gal Katherine. If Jack's girl is here, they don't mention it. Though I guess she was stuck sick at home. If that's not enough TV magic for ya, geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet a load of this.
Eric walks out onto the club's stage and announces that men are idiots, but that "this will make up for it." Hot Stuff by Donna Summer starts playing as the boys all come out on stage and to this ridiculous dance number. Buuuuuut I guess it is also pretty funny, especially seeing Feeny up there, workin it.
EYYBODY GETTIN LAID T'NIGHT! EYYBODY!
It does one of those freeze-then-fade-out things as they finish the dance. During the credits, some more dancing occurs, and we learn that Nunzio taught them all that routine. GOD DAMMIT NUNZIO! YOU'RE THE BEST CHARACTER ON THE SHOW! Let's see, Nunzio was played by Jonathan Del Arco, who had decent success for a while after Boy Meets World, but finally landed a recurring role on The Closer from '07 to '12, and now a spinoff of The Closer that's going into its fourth season. Good for him. Also, before Boy Meets World, he played Hugh the Borg, on two episodes of STAR TREK THE NEXT GENERATION. What. A. Boss.
Back to the show though, Jack hooks up with Sonja here at the club, and Eric hooks up with Cookie, who still doesn't have lines. She actually mouths out the word "no" when Eric asks her a question, because speaking costs a lot more. And after that dance number, we are DEFINITELY over budget.
Plot: 1.0 - I'm not sure what more you can ask for here. Everyone had their own storyline, and they all came together at the end.
Character Development: 0.5 - Not much, but this is Shawn's first serious relationship, so even though it's not really addressed, it's interesting to see him deal with this whole "jealousy" thing for the first time.
Humor: 2.0 - The same way that Shallow Boy was the pinnacle of Eric-humor, this is the pinnacle of Cory+Shawn humor. It's top 5 funniest in the series for me.
Life Lesson: 0.5 - Men are idiots.
4.0 out of 4.0. It needed some bonus points to get there, but I really think this episode deserves it. Like I said earlier, this episode just feels like Boy Meets World. I've seen some threads on reddit like "What episode should I show someone who's never seen the show before", and I would go with this one. Maybe I'm biased since that's what I did with a good friend of mine a long time ago, and he loved this episode. It is constantly getting real laughs out of me. Who wrote this... Okay, it was Jeff Menell, and he's been writing for the show since season 1. He's done a lot of great episodes.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:25:46 GMT
Episode 5x11 "A Very Topanga Christmas"
It is indeed Christmas time, and Cory's making sure his family members don't do anything embarrassing while Topanga stays with them. He pulls Eric aside and shows him the "promise ring" he bought for Topanga, which "means we'll be together forever." Eric comments how precious that is, but also adds that Cory and Topanga are "freaks". See, that one tiny line puts the relationshippy nonsense in a totally different light. In, say, Long Walk to Pittsburgh, or Chasing Angela, we're supposed to believe that this relationship is the pinnacle of success, and everyone should strive for it. So by quickly adding the disclaimer that they're freaks, we can proceed with a much more relaxed perspective.
Amy arrives at the front door with Topanga, saying "look what I brought you for Christmas". Cory responds "Oh look, Miss Topanga-Head," like Miss Potato Head, which is a much better Topanga-name-joke than anything I ever came up with. Alan brings out his "special egg nog", so you know it's time to get blasted. This tradition isn't well received by Topanga though, whose family prefers to drink hot cider around Christmas.
She further insists that they go out and buy a fresh cut tree, instead of Alan's beloved aluminum tree. Even more, she is expecting to open gifts on Christmas Eve, another clash with the Matthews family. Eric pulls his little brother aside while Topanga retrieves her top-of-the-tree ornament from upstairs. The law is laid down. Eric calls Cory out for being completely whipped (without that exact terminology), but Cory insists that he will defy his girlfriend on the matter of the tree's top ornament. He fails.
Mister Feeny has apparently broken into their home as he now enters the living room, ready to read A Christmas Carol to the Matthews family, like he does every year.
This tradition, like all the others so far, is on death row when Topanga decides it would be more fun to have everyone act out the parts of the story. No one defies Mister Feeny. A very clear line has been crossed here.
At The Apartment, the Hunter boys are trying to deal with the fact that they have nothing in common and nothing interesting to do for entertainment. They don't say it, but I'm pretty sure they both miss Eric. Anyway Shawn's history gets reconned a little bit more as he claims he used to dream of having Christmas with his brother, and that now they're going to have the best Christmas ever.
This is suuuuuuuuuuuuuuper boring. Back home, Topanga wakes Cory up at 3 a.m to talk about some bullshit, it doesn't even matter, and Cory doesn't want to be there. Man, they sure are stretching nothing into everything with this episode. It's almost halfway now and all they've done is show us how Topanga's traditions are different from Cory's. There aren't even any jokes, it's just "tehe see how kooky her traditions are". I am not a fan.
Cory, now awake, goes downstairs and finds his father building a model plane on the couch. Apparently he faces a similar ordeal fairly regularly, where Amy wakes him up to talk and then she falls back asleep, leaving him to make models. Cory explains that he doesn't like learning how different he and Topanga are, when he had previously thought they were exactly alike. Even though that's pretty dumb, since we've seen almost zero examples of things they actually have in common. They've always been really different people. Typical Boy Meets World, I guess. Alan doesn't have much advice, but gives his son a model plane to build.
The next morning at breakfast, Topanga continues the execution of Operation: Destroy Christmas, and Cory finally puts his foot down.
I don't know how I can possibly make this review interesting, I'm sorry.
Cory is now at The Apartment with the Hunters. Shawn thinks he's an idiot for ditching Topanga over trivial differences, especially while he and Jack are trying so hard to find one thing that they have in common. I do like that, that we're finally getting another look at this struggle to find brotherhood that they made such a big deal about at the beginning of the season. Unfortunately, all Shawn does is mention it, and the focus is right back on Cory's relationshippy nonsense. Topanga shows up, apologizes for Operation: Destroy Christmas, then heads out again.
Honestly the most enjoyable thing in this episode so far is Jack in this scene, doing this sort of running background joke where he doesn't really know who Topanga is. This has actually been a great week for Jack, I've liked him in all three episodes. But it's only a matter of time before it's back to the old ways. The characters are all night and day between episodes this season. Sometimes Cory is Satan, and then Last Tango In Philly comes around. Eric is the only really consistent character.
Anyway Cory says he's going to hang out at the apartment and watch A Christmas Carol on TV, and Shawn and Jack realize they both love ice skating.
Now it's time for the inevitable dream sequence imitating A Christmas Carol. Mister Feeny has taken on the role of Ghost of Christmas Future. The future reveals an obese Cory eating pancakes for every meal, as well as the happily married couple of Jack and Topanga. WooOOOooo way to go Jack! Japanga have compromised on the Christmas traditions, something Cory didn't even consider.
WOAH SHOTS FIRED. Cory's real sad and some sad music plays. But I'm not sad.
The dream ends and Cory returns home. He gives Topanga the promise ring, and comments that it's a good thing they're different. Topanga agrees and gives him a promise ring as well. It's a sort of cutesy way to show us that they're similar in the ways that matter. Yes, just like the wise sage Eric foretold earlier in the episode, they are both freaks.
During the credits, celebrations are winding down and Feeny harkens everyone over to listen to his reading of A Christmas Carol. It skips ahead to the conclusion, and everyone has fallen asleep.
It's time for a KBM PRO RE-WRITE *guitar solo*
SO THE CAMERA PANS ACROSS THE WHOLE ROOM, RIGHT, we see everybody on the couch, and then finally it's Shawn and Jack in their chairs, but they're both still awake, just sitting there enjoying the story. They don't look at each other or anything, they're just sitting there listening, it's very subtle.
I was so sure that's what was gonna happen while the camera was moving across, SO SURE, what a let down.
Plot: 0.25 - The thirty seconds of Shawn and Jack was good.
Character Development: 0.25 - Shawn and Jack realize this whole brotherhood thing might work out.
Humor: 0.25 - Eric had almost no screen time, nobody else was very funny except that one Jack bit.
Life Lesson: 0.5 - Christmas Future Feeny's comments about compromise in relationships were important, but we don't ever see it implemented. Cory just goes home and gives Topanga the promise ring.
1.25 out of 4.0. It sucks. Almost nothing redeeming going on here. Turnaround in season 2 still holds the title of best holiday episode of the series. Christmas episodes are notorious for being bad across all series, and Very Topanga Christmas is no exception. It was a waste of time.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:26:28 GMT
Episode 5x12 "Raging Cory"
It's the Matthews basketball championship game between Eric and Alan, in scenic The Driveway. Problem is, Cory's not included. He wants to be, though, and wants a game with his father after Eric, but Alan's already exhausted after goofing around with Eric all day. Things get heated, and Cory accidentally knocks his father to the ground.
There's trouble at The Apartment too, as Jack "pokes a bubble" on the ceiling of his room and a bunch of water collapses in on him. Shawn offers to let Jack stay in his room for the time being, and it is an absolute monstrosity. I can't imagine why Angela wouldn't take some steps to get him to clean this place up, it's pretty bad. Jack comments that "a pig would never live here," but that's not quite true, as it turns out.
I hope that's a callback to 3x06.
It's probably a coincidence though, since the writers have proven that they can't keep track of a damn thing.
Cory joins us in Shawn's room, I guess he broke into the apartment, and explains what happened with his father. The "talking based relationship" isn't enough for Cory, who wants to actually do stuff, like Eric gets to. Shawn insists that Cory has a great relationship with his father, and he's also hilarious here. One after the other with the jokes, they really nailed this scene.
It's 2 a.m and Mister Feeny knocks on the patio-to-kitchen door as Alan is preparing a sandwich. Feeny can't sleep since he knows there's a problem and yet nobody came to him for advice. It's a funny little self aware bit, and Feeny explains to Alan that Cory's upset because of their "talking based relationship".
There really isn't much to say so far. It's been separated into very easy-to-summarize little bits.
There's this long gag now where Jack is trying to fall asleep in Shawn's room, but Shawn needs the light on to remind him of the headlights shining through his window back in the trailer park, and he also needs to play this tape called Sounds of the Trailer Park.It's not nearly as funny as that first scene with Shawn, but we do learn that the pig's name is Little Cory, just like it was in 3x06, so maybe it is actually a callback. Anyway, things escalate and the Hunter boys are about to throw down. Jack decides he'd rather sleep though, "in the dark, like a normal person," and Shawn looks pretty hurt. And I don't blame him! That was a punch right in the insecurity.
The next morning, Topanga breaks into the apartment to wake up Cory.
She assures him that he has a great relationship with his father, just like Shawn said, but Cory still ain't buyin it. Just then, Alan and Eric show up at the door and kidnap Cory to go skydiving. Well that's a quick resolution at 8 minutes. I was worried we'd spend the entire episode on this, and then have some moving activity together at the end, but we're knocking it out quick.
Our Matthews boys are in the skydiving plane now, in the longest scene in the universe. It's stretched out to four minutes as Alan explains to Cory that he truly values their talking relationship, that he loves to hear his opinions on politics and philosophy and such. Cory jumps out of the plane first, and we see how the rest of the episode is going go. Eric explains that he wants that meaningful, deep relationship too, that he wants to talk to his father about politics and other important stuff.
Holy crap, that was extremely harsh. Jumping out of a plane rather than talking to your son. Poor Eric. Back at home, Cory's playing basketball with Alan now, and Eric is the one who ends up pushing Alan down this time. The scene ends pretty abruptly though, so we'll have to see how it pans out later.
At The Apartment, Jack plays Shawn a recording of him both talking and snoring in his sleep. They argue some more about how disgusting the room is, it's basically the same scene as before, except they actually fight this time.
I don't think this was pieced together properly. Cory's obviously not staying on their couch anymore, and that was the only reason Jack was staying in Shawn's room anyway. Jack can totally just take the couch now, (or sleep in Eric's room). So I feel like this scene was supposed to happen earlier, before Cory got kidnapped, but whatever. Out in the living room, Cory arrives to smooth things over with Eric, and Eric explains that he'll be joining the witness protection program. It's hilarious, because it's Eric, but the plot doesn't actually move at all.
Back in Shawn's room, the boys are still fighting, it's really unclear if maybe time just passes more slowly in Shawn's bedroom, I don't know. Ultimately, they both realize that they're not actually fighting about the messy room, but rather about... not getting to know each other.. while they were growing up..? It's not well written at all. I get that they both might wish they got to know each other earlier, but I don't know why they would... physically fight about it... It's weird. Doesn't make a lot of sense.
Later that night, we're back in the driveway where Amy gets to do the speech of the day, which is a rare sight indeed. She's basically explaining that he's gotta give both sons both sides of him, that this "talking vs doing" split between them isn't going to work anymore. Amy hasn't been given a lot of love when it comes to speeches, but I'm pleased with how this one turned out.
Now it's Eric's turn to be kidnapped.
So they're at an art museum where, ALLEGEDLY, Cory enjoys going with Alan sometimes. This goes back to the whole "why is Cory suddenly a scholar" thing from 5x09. Anyway Eric chooses an abstract sculpture thing to try to interpret, and he sees it as a metaphor for, to paraphrase, a father monkey with two sons and only one coconut. It's a heartwarming little scene, and it turns out that Eric actually knows a decent amount about art but always thought Alan didn't want to hear about it.
During the credits, Alan confirms with Morgan that they have a good relationship where they talk and also do fun things together. It might not seem like much to the casual viewer, but I'm really glad they decided to throw that in.
Plot: 0.75 - The Shawn and Jack thing was stuuuuuuuuuuuupid, oh my goodness. Sooooooooooo stupid. But I do love Alan, and this father son story felt very season 1, where Alan got a lot of good stories.
Character Development: 1.0 - This whole father son thing grew pretty dramatically, and we got to see some new sides of all the Matthews men. And I guess Shawn and Jack sort of did some shit but who cares.
Humor: 1.0 - Eric and Shawn, of course, stand out the most.
Life Lesson: 0.5 - I'm not really sure what we can take away from this, other than that you shouldn't be afraid to improve your relationships with your parents (or your kids).
3.25 out of 4.0. If this review was bad, I'm sorry, it's been a shitty day. This is a pretty good episode though.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:26:59 GMT
Episode 5x13 "The Eskimo"
This first scene... oozes Boy Meets World. It is wholly and thoroughly representative of the characters' school lives. Who else but our own Jeff Menell, a writer since season 1, could have pulled this off? Shawn hasn't turned in Feeny's latest assignment, and Cory claims that they wrote one paper together. Cory's paper got a B, so Feeny divides it in half to give both boys a D, but they complain about it and receive F's instead. Naturally, Topanga jumps to their defense, claiming "an F follows you around for life." Cory explains that he doesn't mind getting an F since his and Shawn's college applications are already sent in. That's not quite true though, since Shawn didn't bother to send his in, even though Cory filled them out for him. According to Shawn, "people like me don't go to college."
This is refreshing, that they're addressing the harsh reality of Shawn's situation. At the same time though, I suppose he would pay for it the same way Eric is paying for it. Although Eric did have a job for a while, so who knows. Also, the popular thought right now is that Cory is a terrible teacher on Girl Meets World since the class is constantly talking about whatever the hell they want while he's teaching. If you watch this scene though, you'll see that it's really not exclusive to GMW. Feeny's dealing with the same kind of crap here.
Shawn and Cory comment that there's nothing left for Feeny to teach them. Mister Feeny is the most pissed off we've ever seen him at this apathy (commonly known as senioritis), and tells the other students to leave the room. Once again Topanga tries to play defense, and this only makes their teacher angrier. We're talking full Hulk mode right now. He orders Topanga to stay too, calling her a "little control freak." Further, he wants Shawn's assignment delivered to him by 5:00 that afternoon. Shawn claims that an equally impossible task would be finding tickets to the Super Bowl, so Feeny gives him that assignment instead, due by the end of the week. The new assignment for Topanga is to butt out of other people's lives for one week or she gets an F, to which she responds that she's "never failed before".
Last but not least, Cory's assignment is to make sure that both Topanga and Shawn succeed in theirs, or he will fail alongside them. That was a lot of summary for this first scene, but there's a lot going on and the details are important.
I can't stress enough how great this scene is. We've done some wishy-washin with these characters this season, but this scene shows us the best dynamic we have between them. These characterizations are what stick out in my mind when I think of Boy Meets World. Shawn dealing with his demons, Cory coming along for the ride, Topanga sticking her nose in, and Feeny dishing out the tough love. I could watch this scene for the rest of my life.
At The Apartment, we learn that Eric and Jack have both had a rough time with dating lately. Jack is actually enjoyable to watch here, which is always nice. The writers did try to make Jack sound like a ladies' man when we first met him, but that is clearly not the case anymore.
They resolve to find their soul mates, instead of just dating random women like they've been doing. So this is our silly sidestory for the day.
At home, our two heroes are brainstorming how to find tickets to the super bowl, while Topanga tries her best to stay out of it. We hear on the radio that the station is holding a contest to win, you guessed it, tickets to the Super Bowl. The boys are too oblivious to hear it though, so Topanga has to sort of mime her way into getting them to notice, without actually butting in.
*Edit* As per request, another gif of Topanga playing charades.
Ultimately, they figure it out and Shawn manages to call in and enter the contest. It's a really fun little scene, and while you might want to be annoyed at this convenient solution, we'll see why it doesn't actually matter later.
The contest is to stand up on a billboard for as long as possible in the 16 degrees winter weather, and the last one remaining wins the tickets. Jumping over to that scene, Cory climbs the ladder up the billboard to bring his best buddy some hot chocolate, which really ought to be against some kind of rule. Shawn eliminates one of the other contestants who was only here because likes billboards, leaving only the Hunter boy and one other contestant: an Inuit guy on summer vacation here in January, currently eating an ice cream cone. ...Shawn is fucked, and it's depressing, since he really thought he had a chance to pull this off.
So yeah, the deus ex radio isn't a big deal since he didn't win the tickets anyway.
The protagonist trio arrive in Feeny's classroom to have a word. And this is the kind of scene that blows the mind of the casual viewer. See, they all know that Feeny ususally goes for the "lesson behind the lesson", and think they've got this one figured out. In response to their earlier senioritis, they've reasoned out that Feeny just wanted them to continue trying their hardest, which they actually did on this Super Bowl ticket assignment. And that's what I thought too, the first time. It's what any show would do. But George Feeny is not moved. He wants to see the Super Bowl tickets.
The gravitas of Mister Feeny here, and of this scene in general, is outstanding. "You have no idea what I want." I absolutely love it. One of the best in the series. The viewer is left with this feeling like "What the fuck just happened dude... I thought... but..."
For a drastic change in tone, we head over to The Apartment, where Jack and Eric are about to embark on their second dates with two girls we haven't met yet. They're both pretty cool, but Eric's date Jill is starting to seem like a better fit for Jack, while Jack's date Carol is acting a lot like Eric.
Ahhhhh the ol' double date switcharoo. It was bound to happen eventually. But I don't really mind the cliche, Eric is keeping things fresh, like always. He's like tupperware. Eric is the tupperware of the show. The Zip Lock bag.
Shawn Hunter is looking introspective as hell on the billboard where the contest previously took place. The previous board has been replaced with a picture of that Eskimo saying "I'm going to the Super Bowl".Cory and Topanga join him to try to make him feel better. This is it folks. This is the true climax of the Shawn Hunter story arc. I want to put every single line into a gif, they're all wonderful. The gist of it all is that with all these metaphorical Eskimos standing in his way, he's already convinced himself that he'll never succeed. Because of his past and the roadblocks he's currently faced with, he realizes that he defeats himself before he ever even starts.
Then, in his most significant moment of development, he says fuck it, I'm going to the Super Bowl. Cory tries to convince him that he doesn't have to go anywhere, but Shawn sees it differently.
It's so good you guys. I love this episode so much. This was another one of the best scenes in the series, but only because of all the work we've done building up Shawn's character. The moment where he finally flips the middle finger to his Eskimos and decides that he's going to go get what he wants. Without Cory's help. Epic.
We spend the next three minutes at The Apartment where Eric and Jack are trying to execute The Swap.
They are unsuccessful. The whole thing is hilarious though, and it's due in large part to Jack's behavior. He actually wanted do The Swap at the same time Eric did, they're partners here, building off of each other, rather than having Jack's reluctant heckling like we did earlier in the season. The girls get mad and bail out of there, and later we see that they're actually waiting in the hallway, saying "I can't believe they're not coming after us," which I think is just absolute BS. That's some middle school crap.
Time to close this thing out, ladies and gentlemen, in Feeny's classroom.
Like before, I want to turn every line into a gif. Cory goes on to explain that Shawn didn't need him on this one, and that he had to step out of the way for his friend to go on his own. Feeny informs Cory that he and Shawn have both passed the assignment with flying colors. Indeed, he wanted Cory to see that Shawn can't succeed just because Cory wants him to, that Shawn has to want to succeed and believe that he can on his own.
"Then why did you want me to help him?"
"You need to know you won't always be able to."
The same lesson applies to Topanga, who needed to learn that a time will come when she won't be able to help Shawn and Cory. Further, a time will come when Feeny won't be able to help them, and that's why he's still pushing them so hard in the second half of their senior year, while he still can. That's why he was so hurt by the notion that there's "nothing left to teach", because he wants to keep helping them as much as he can, while he can. (The impact of this otherwise beautiful sentiment is slightly lessened since we know he follows them to college, but whatever.)
Another fantastic, A+ scene.
During the credits, everybody's watching The Super Bowl at Chubbie's. Everyone except Shawn...
Plot: 1.0 - What a story. Twists and turns, a powerful plot, compelling narrative. It's everything you could want.
Character Development: 1.0 - "I'm my own worst Eskimo." "I do have to go somewhere, because if I don't, I'll never go anywhere." The best part is that the writers were smart enough not to include Angela in any of Shawn's business today. That could have really ruined everything.
Humor: 1.0 - Jack and Eric were spot on, they could have earned the point themselves, but Cory was also really funny from start to finish.
Life Lesson: 1.0 - The triumph of the individual spirit and determination. Say "fuck you" to your Eskimos. Your metaphorical ones, I mean. Don't be rude to people.
4.0 out of 4.0. My #1 favorite episode. I will talk about this episode to anyone who will listen, so thank you all very much for listening. Leave comments.
I've been looking forward to this review since the beginning. It's all downhill from here, there's only a handful of good ones left, but DAMN do I love this episode. It is absolutely my most watched episode, and that's probably true for a lot of people, especially at the end at Chubbie's. This show fully encapsulates what Boy Meets World means to me. The only trouble is that you'll need to have seen the previous seasons to really get the full effect of Shawn's growth here, the same way Eric getting into college wouldn't have meant as much without all the buildup before it.
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Post by sbtbfanatic on Jun 25, 2015 13:27:33 GMT
Episode 5x14 "Heartbreak Cory"
The seniors of John Adams High are making final preparations for their class ski trip. They're in the school's hallway, I think they're waiting for the bus. Now, I know that a "senior ski trip" was mentioned in some capacity in a previous season, and it's killing me that I can't remember when it was. Somebody please save me on this one.
A few days in ski country with no parents? That's right, our boys want to get laid. Shawn's even got blueprints of the ski lodge to plan their midnight shenanigans. Hey Shawn, how was the Super Bowl? What's that? Not gonna bring that up again? Gotcha.
And they do this kinda bullshit thing where OF COURSE THE WOMEN WOULDN'T BE INTERESTED IN SEX, but it's the 90's, so what are we gonna do.
Romantic plans are better made with your partner, though, as Topanga informs her boyfriend. So they have a little flirty romancey dialogue and it's actually compelling, and... passionate. Like everything else this season, the Corpanga romance dialogue is either great or garbage. Mostly garbage, but this one deserves credit.
Anyway, we get to the ski lodge/hotel that's housing an entire senior class, and things have immediately taken a turn for the worse. Cory has apparently destroyed his ankle getting off the bus.
A female employee of the ski lodge is somehow able to assess the damage, and claims it's a mild sprain, which will prevent Cory from being able to ski. All of his friends leave to go skiing without him, leaving him alone with the female employee. The chemistry between Cory and this girl is immediately overwhelming. They banter, it's adorable, she gets them both some hot chocolate and they start to play backgammon. She introduces herself as Lauren.
Lauren is played by Linda Cardellini, who's done all KINDS of work over the years, and is still very active. She was Velma in those Scooby Doo movies with Sarah Michelle Gellar, but more importantly, she had a recurring role (8 episodes) as Sylvia Rosen in season 6 of MAD MEN! Yup, that's right, DON DRAPER had a season-long affair with LAUREN FROM BOY MEETS WORLD. HOWBOUTDATSHIT.
Hey Linda Cardellini, maybe you should find your own man instead of takin somebody else's all the time. Me, for example.
It fades to black for a commercial, and we come back later in the day when Coren are working on a jigsaw puzzle. They banter some more, and it's still adorable. Trouble arrives in paradise, though, when Topanga returns from the slopes. Shawn can see exactly what's going on here, no matter how much Cory denies it.
Later that night, Corpanga and Shangela are playing one of those silly couples'-games and Topanga's being very cutesy and romancey and blech. Cory asks her what animal she would want her partner to be, and she says a falcon, because they always come home or something. Recalling that earlier flirting bit, we can see how very hard they're trying to show us that this is a good relationship.
Wow, really guys? Because I could have sworn the entire basis of your relationship was "I wanna be like them." But if we're just gonna pretend that 5x08 never happened, that is fine by me. Make no mistake, I'm glad they're back in reality, but I can't just gloss over these inconsistencies.
Topanga invites Lauren to play their stupid game with them, which... why...? Apparently it's Cory's turn to answer a question, and Topanga hands Lauren the book of stupid couples' questions game book of questions. Lauren, the sly fox that she is, finds a question about whether or not the guilt of having an affair would affect Cory's behavior. He freaks out and starts rambling, it's hilarious.
Because they're jerks, Topanga, Shawn, and Angela decide to go to bed right after Lauren starts playing, leaving Cory in her clutches once again. They have some more sweet dialogue, the chemistry is as real as ever, and they look at the moon rising over the mountains together while some emotional acoustic guitar plays. The guitar tells us that they're really trying to sell us on this pairing, right, and I think that's the critical reason that people (or maybe just me) like this episode so much. It's not some bull shit homewrecker story, you know the one, where at the end Topanga tells Lauren to keep her hands off of "MAH MAN" and the audience cheers, IT'S NOT THAT. It's a genuine look at the thought of "wow, maybe there's someone else out there." We are absolutely not supposed to hate Lauren, she is not evil, she just likes Cory. And that's all infinitely better than the "NOPE WE'RE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER FOREVER" crap they've been feeding us with Topanga lately.
We learn that Corauren ended up talking all night when Mister Feeny (the chaperon of the ski trip, of course) greets them the next morning with a "How ya doin". I think one of the GMW review blogs is or was keeping track of the number of How Ya Doin's, Seems like Michael Jacobs is a fan of that line. And so am I.
Feeny tries his best to reserve judgment, and his disapproval is very subtle. It seems that he wants to let Cory make his own choices instead of giving a speech, which I think was a very mature decision from the writers.
Lauren gets up to start doing work related things, and Cory follows her, showing us, and her, and Shawn in the background, that his ankle is better. But when Topanga joins the scene and asks about his ankle... he claims it's still bothering him. And Shawn is PISSED. Cory tries to explain that he can't have feelings for another girl, which still doesn't answer the question of why he lied about his ankle, but here we are.
Later, Cory confronts Lauren to make sure she understands that "last night didn't mean anything." She responds expertly with "You lied to your girlfriend because last night didn't mean anything?" It's 100% clear at this point that Cory likes Lauren and is in denial, and she decides to kiss him. Now, whether or not that crosses a line, and how significant that line may or may not be, are topics way beyond the scope of this blog. And that's okay. We're supposed to be conflicted. This is the first time the audience is mostly silent for a major development like that, you know why? Because the audience's noises are intended to guide us, to show us when something is funny or sad or romantic, but this time? The show doesn't want to tell us how to feel. We're not supposed to know. It's uncertain. It's hard. Even Cory's not sure how to respond, so he just walks off, clearly affected by the kiss.
In the next scene, Shawn insists that Cory never ever tell Topanga about the kiss. I think we can all agree that that is terrible advice. Cory did absolutely nothing wrong and they're both idiots for not telling Topanga. Granted, I would wait until they left so that Topanga can't start some shit, but he should definitely tell her. Whatever. Cory takes Shawn's advice.
He does explain that he lied about his ankle in order to stay and explain to Lauren that talking all night didn't mean anything, and Topanga handles it like the rational adult she is. It's impressive for a tv show, and it'd be more impressive if I could focus on anything besides Topanga's TALONS.
Seriously, her fingernails are INSANE in this episode. Other than those claws, she's been the best version of herself that we've seen in a while, which was definitely necessary for this story to work. Anyway Topanga asks if anything else happened with Lauren, and Cory, and he says no, which we know is a lie. As everyone is leaving the lodge, Lauren gives Cory a letter to read since they never got a chance to talk after the kiss. Naturally, the letter falls out of his bag for Topanga to find as a cliffhanger.
Nothing actually happens during the credits, it's just some upbeat guitar music and the show's logo. I honestly really like this tune, it's so relaxing, but maybe that's mostly nostalgia.
Plot: 1.0 - It's a good story. Very real. Even though it is mostly a bottle episode. There isn't actually a whole lot of content, but it's fun to watch Cory and Lauren talking.
Character Development: 0.75 - I don't really know what to do for this one. It's significant that Cory slightly questions the soulmate-ness of Topanga, I guess. And I'll give points for the imaginary development of Cory dating Lauren.
Humor: 0.75 - It was funny enough. No Eric, though, so it was big odds going in.
Life Lesson: 0.5 - I don't know what to do for this one either. THIS EPISODE IS SO UNCERTAIN. AHHHHH.
3.0 out of 4.0. I like this episode and maybe I shouldn't. I guess I just like Lauren. Her chemistry with Cory is explosive, and she's so much more interesting than Topanga. And I'm pretty sure Cory knows it. Also, how old is Lauren supposed to be? She said she moved to the mountains when she was 13, but other than that we got nothin.
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